Riveroflifelisajoy’s Weblog

Just another WordPress.com weblog


5:00 in the Morning during A Snow Storm Medical Emergency just before the Holidays!

LIFE STARTS HERE.jpgI sleep on the kitchen floor.  I sleep on a mat with pillows, and  a blanket on the kitchen floor.  I am watching over my mother at night while she sleeps on her ten inch thick mattress from Sealy Posterpedic. 

 She had a stroke some years ago.  But my concern is regarding her arthritis and waking up and needing assistance.  I have a ten inch thick mattress too.  But it is upstairs in my bedroom.  So I sleep down stairs for the sake of my mother in case she needs me. 

 But one night recently I awoke with a start!  I heard a screach, or scream or some sort of ungodly howl that sent shivers up and down my spine.  You see, I sleep very light because I am the watchman in the night for my family.  I used to have dogs, and the watching was their job…but I can not have pets anymore….so my sleep is very, very, very light. 

 I heard that screach and howl and I somehow flew to my feet and ran into the dinning room and found my child on the floor shaking and jerking.  Daniel!  Daniel!  Mommy’s here!  Daniel! Daniel!  Mommy is here! 

 I tried to turn him  on his side but he was very stiff.  His eyes were wide open, but turned to the side and beet red.  He did not hear me.  I wanted to call for help. My mother heard the uproar and asked what was happening! 

 I told her that Daniel was having a seizure.  It appeared that he was on the computer and was possibly sitting up in the dinning room chair and had fallen off the chair to the floor.  He missed hitting the computer, and the china cabinet thank God. 

 This was a bad one.  I was shaking internally, and I wanted to call 911.  I was counting the minutes of how long this seizure was lasting. and praying that it would not go into stasis.  (a non stop seizure which can be life threatening). 

I watched him and prayed that this evil internal assault on my child of 14  years old would soon stop. It did.  He closed his eyes and I ran up stairs to get the phone line adjusted. 

You see I can not afford the expensive computer set up for the Internet like other people.  I have the AOL phone jack.  My son appeared to have been on the computer Internet and so I had to put the phone back on. 

His bedroom has the phone jack in it so I had to go into his darkened room to fix the telephone line.  The light bulb needed to be replaced in the ceiling.  I had told him to replace the bulb the other day and he did not do it to my dismay! 

I could not get the phone to work once I had fumbled around in the dark.  I ran back down stairs and then banged on my landlords door.  She came up and  gave me her cell phone. I dialed 911!  My son opened his eyes and sat up on the dining room chair and put his head in his hands. 

I ran to the kitchen and dragged my mat, blanket and pillow to the dining room.  I commanded my son to lay down and rest. He looked at me in a clueless way but listened to me. 

 He lay down.  I continued to talk to him and he went into a sleep.  I had to run to the restroom.  I had been feeling sick myself but from more regular reasons, PMS.  Ugh!  Why does everything go wrong at the wrong time? 

I wanted to stay by my child’s side…but instead I had to run to the toilet and tend to my own stupid needs!  I was so angry with my body!  I went back to my son and checked him.  He was still sleeping soundly. 

I went to the window and looked out and saw two EMS trucks approaching.  It was bad weather too.  5:00 in the morning!  Snow and slush was all over the place and the wind was blowing badly.  The  bare winterized tree limbs were straining against the wind. 

 I dreaded the next few hours of leaving the house in this bad weather,  following the ambulance to the hospital, and answering questions that were asked by doctors and nurses.

  Watching over my son and worrying about my mother and how she would feel knowing that her grandson had to be taken to the hosptial at 5:00a.m. in the morning!  But for now I just opened the door.  Three EMS techs came in. 

My son was still asleep as they approached him.  When they spoke to him he awoke with a start.  He seemed dazed, but he knew where he was.  They took him to the hospital and I followed behind in my car. 

 Since he was stable it would be easier to get him home.  I talked to my mother and told her  I would be back later.  I left her with some breakfast food and then left. 

 The EMS techs warned me about the hazardous driving conditions.  They were so nice…one of them actually helped me down the rather steep steps to the house.   

 When I arrived at the hospital I found my son and a doctor was talking to him.  She was young,  possibly in her mid thirties.  She was a bit snippy too.  She kept repeating herself that she wanted to get the story straight.

  She was annoyed with my son because he had answered her incorrectly.  I was beginning to get annoyed too….but at her not my son.  I kind of gave her a stiff reply and then added a bit more to the response than she expected.

  She then left the room and a more pleasant doctor came in and developed a good a rapport with me and my son.  “Who wants to go the hospital at 5:00a.m.– during a snow storm!

  My son had just had a seizure and was not able to express himself clearly.  This doctor was  better in his response.  The otber doctor seemed not to have the right  attitude at all. 

 She had stated that she was getting off of work at 6:00 and needed to leave so she needed the entire story! I was still upset about what had brought me to the hospital in the first place and I was not up to fighting with her at that time.

But looking back,  I realize that she had been quite rude and not really as concerned with my son’s health as she was with the time she would be leaving work.  The hospital I am talking about is NorthShoreManhasset.

  I always liked the treatment my son received there.  But for some reason this doctor was quite rude and had little or no compassion on my son who is still a minor (below the age of eighteen).

  He did not committ any crime.  He had had a seizure.  So why was she not compassionate?  Look,  this is the real world….people do not care. 

 Some people do care…but most do not.  Doctor or not,  medical conditions are all they (some) care about.  Generally I have found that North Shore Manhassett  hospital would help my child….I was glad when this woman (Doctor) left my son’s side.

  He was tired and not able to answer the questions clearly.  She was impatient.  We went through a series of questions that seemed to make no difference.  I tried to explain his condition and all she cared about was getting out of that room.  

 Finally a new doctor arrived and then they did chest xrays, checked the heart and decided to have him see a cardiologist and Synder Children’s Hospital the next day. 

The next day we went to all of the doctors that we were supposed to see.  My son missed school,  I missed work.  I was worried about my job….but my child’s health does come first. 

 I have no body to help me —so off we went from one doctor (specialist) to another.  The second day we went to see his pediatrician, who reprimanded my son for staying up so late. 

He believed that my son had fallen asleep in the chair and fell off and then had the seizure.  I cannot say what was the trigger….but it was Saturday night and my son was being a typical teenager. 

  I try not to baby him,  but I see I have to monitor his hours of sleep….even if he does not particularly like it. 

This blog is for those who have experienced this medical condition and want to know that you are not alone!  My son is still going through medical testing.

  So I just keep a close watch on him and my mother.  I still sleep in the kitchen on the floor on my mat.  (I constantly mop and clean and wax my floors so not to worry),  and my son must go to bed atleast before 1AM. 

  Health conditions are made worse by lack of sleep and over extending the body. 

Till next blog:


Dangerous! Dangerous! Plastic Surgery…the tragic Loss of Kanye West’s Mom, Donda

Elective surgery is just that,  ELECTIVE. 

Plastic surgery needs to be called or renamed something else.  Stop making “light” of invasive techniques that augment a person’s appearance. 

 When I was a kid I thought that “plastic surgery”  was not “real” surgery.  I thought that a person went into a operating room and came out beautiful—with out pain and glowing!  

 I thought that women came out in a yesteryear “Greek” goddess dress ( toga) and men came out in a white toga too! 

Suddenly they would look years younger and the bags under their eyes,  the dark circles would be gone. 

I thought it was a simple process!   Then that show called EXTREME MAKEOVERS came on TV and forever changed my view of “plastic surgery forever! 

 If you noticed,  they never took candidates for plastic surgery if they were obese!  You had to be in good basic health. 

 If you were slightly heavy they would not take you.  They would make you shake off those extra pounds with an extreme make over exercise person before the surgery!  Then the pain of the surgery, and recovery room and hospital stay would be shown. 

 But they never allowed someone to go home or to the hotel room immediately afterward!  

That is what happened to dear Kanye’s Mom  D0nda!   Look,  the doctor does not have to live or love his patient—but he is supposed to look out for that patient’s health. 

 The medical oath that all doctors take states,”First…DO NO HARM!”   I read the  blurb on this Doctor,  who just happened to be in California,  had a television show,  was black,  and good looking. 

 That should be a great thing!  But instead it spelled out a very deadly perscription in this case.  I cried today looking at the picture of Kanye and his Mom. 

 I could see the love between Mother and Child—not Kanye West (the rapper)  but instead I saw the look on his face in the AOL Black Voices blog on  the last pictures that were taken for Essence Magazine. 

I saw the pictures of Kanye when he was a baby and his Mom was holding him in her arms and talking to him….So sweet,  so gentle was her picture with her new baby.  I heart hurts to think of this tragic unnessesary loss! 

 She was only 58 years young!  She was a symbol of success  for the young black,  white,  brown young men and young women today.  She had been a college professor in California and she also had been a Fulbright Scholar!!! 

 This woman was an icon for me!  So what went wrong?  Mistakes do happen.  Not the doctor—he did not make a mistake—the doctor,  after the autopsy results come in will have a different out c0me.  The mistake that was made might have been through trusting him to know what he was doing. 

 The mistake was believing that he had his patient’s best interest at heart.  But really,  how would the patient know?  This is difficult to answer.  No one knows what was stated between the doctor and his patient.  No one knows the promises that had been made. 

But I will describe a situation that I went through and maybe that might help to ease some of the pain…..but for me the pain is there.  Although I did not know Donda West,  I feel like she was a “sister in my head”–she was everything I am striving to be—well educated,  my son successful at whatever he wants to be in life,  and she herself making a difference in life by being an educator!  

Such a tragic waste of such a beautiful woman!

A couple of years ago,  I had a lump or nodule,  a tumor inside my left cheek.  I do not know when it got there….but it was there. 

It would not bother me most of the time.  Since it was inside my mouth it would sit on top of my bottom left molar.  It did not bother me until I had something to eat. 

Then I had to keep adjusting it so I could chew my food.  God forebid I eat a piece of meat….sometimes I would bite that stupid lump so hard by mistake I would see stars!!!! 

 So of course to make a long story short I had a referral from my doctor to see a surgeon.  A ‘HEAD AND NECK’ surgeon to be exact.  He  was quite handsome to say the least! 

He looked like the dark foreboding Dr.  Killdare  if any of you are old enough to remember that black and white television show a about the ever so serious Dr. Killdare. 

Well anyway after I got over my doctors good looks,  I began to dislike him tremedously!!! 

 I was afraid of the surgery for the  most part.  I thought he was not telling me everything.

  I thought that I had oral cancer and he was trying to keep me calm by not discussing it in detail.  He gave me a date of the surgery.  He told me I would not be hospitalized, and said that I would not be given general sedation. 

 I was unhappy after he said that.  Why you ask?  I am a BIG,  BIG,  BIG BABY !  that is why!  What do you mean no sedation?!!!! 

 I have to have it!  I can not take knowing that you are digging around in my mouth and I am awake to see, hear,  smell,  taste blood and all that! 

What if that lump has a big root and  you have to yank on it or somthing?!!!  I was too through with my handsome Dr.  Killdare—he was mean,  evil uggggggh!!!!! 

I think he thought I was a bit nutty but I did not care!  I called up and spoke to the medical center where the surgery was to be preformed.  I spoke to the head surgeon. 

 He calmed me down.  He asked me some questions about my general health and I told him.  He said that he would make sure that I was comfortable and not to worry.

  Because worry would not be good for your surgery.  Try to take it easy.  Well, a friend of mine who is a police officer accompanied me with my son and he waited outside.  I was dressed in my hospital gown and given my little green surgery hat. 

 Uggggh!!!  The butterflies began to grow in my stomach and crawl up my throat into my neck.  I started to shiver a bit inside my gut,  after I laid in the bed and looked around. 

 I saw a young teenager.  I saw an older woman,  and other surgery patients recoperating.  The room was very large.

 A nurse approached me and asked me two times, “What is your name?  How old are you?  Please come and get on the scale.”  Then the jokes started. 

“What are you having today?  Oh,  you have a little nodule in your mouth….you must have been telling lies to get that!!! Aha,  aha!!! chuckle,  chuckle! 

I tried to smile,  but no matter what that nurse said to make me laugh I could not stop thinking about what was coming next. 

All I could think of was some type of WOODY ALLEN scene with me jumping off of the table and being held down by the doctor and the nurses while they attempted to yank this stupid lump out of my left cheek. 

 I also pictured being disfigured because the lump was about an inch long.  Oh, Lord,  have mercy,  help me Lord.  I said the psalm 23,  and asked G0d to give me the strength. 

As I was laying there another  person approached and asked me my name two times( to make sure I guess)  and then he started to talk about sedation. 

 I told him that I need to sleep.  I do not want to know what is going on in this surgery.  He said that it is dangerous to go to sleep.  He will make sure that I do not feel anything but it is dangerous to go to sleep. 

 He also asked me two times about my general health.  Figure the math,  I am overweight etc.  so that was definitely not a good sign for the gentleman with the sedation. 

He walked away.  Then here came Dr. Killdare—(as handsome and mean as ever!)  “Oh-come on!!  he said, beginning to get annoyed with my childish behavior you do not need general sedation!!!  It is a little thing in there!!!!  Just let me give you a local and you will be fine.  You know how it is?!  Just like when you go to the dentist!” 

Look,  I said,  I do not handle dental appointments very well.  I had been through something as a kid and I cannot take a needle to be put in my mouth without something to calm me.  I am afraid I may jump up and cause myself more problems. 

Please,  Please I begged Dr. Killdare—-I need sedation inorder to cope with this! So he did authize a mild sedation.  The gentleman that gave it to me,  told me to count backwards and then all I remember was waking up a little and I heard the doctor tell me to open my mouth more. 

 I heard him tell the nurse to “take that for biopsy.”  I closed my eyes again and then I was told to wake up and move very slowly to the next gurney. 

I was wheeled back to my recovery location.  I was really feeling weak,  tired, and dizzy.  But that surgery was over and my mouth had a slight swelling on the inside…but no more stupid LUMP!  

Praise the Lord!  When I opened my eyes I saw a woman across from me.  I don’t know what she had but she was moaning and   her face looked terrrible. 

I think she had a face lift or something.  This was not a hospital.  This place was only for same day,  same day home surgery!  There were packs of blood around her and clear tubes with it moving slowly through them. 

I could not tell if it was being given to her or it was being taken away from her.  It all looked to complicated and messy. 

 Then I understood why Dr. Killdare was so annoyed with me.  I am a big silly baby!!!!  My fearless Dr. Killdare came to my side and said, “How are you feeling?’ 

I felt quite stupid—so I smiled and sheepishly said,”Fine” through the gauze in my mouth.  He said that I had to stay another hour or so. 

 I was not to drive for atleast one week.  He gave me an appointment to come in and see him for a follow up and to get the test results from the lab. 

I received instructions on how to eat.  and then he teased me and said….Wait until it heals….you won’t even know that there ever was anything there!” 

I liked Dr. Killdare again.  I survived. 

But,  I also was being a bad patient at one point because he was trying to make sure that I did not have any complications with sedation.  They have given me a mild one and I did alright.  Thank God. 

Sometimes life can be complicated,  and tragic.  I hope all of us start to listen to the no-s from our doctors,  and the yeses too.  Always get a second opinion and even a third if you are still not happy. 

 Check out your Doctors credentials too.  Becareful out there.  Surgery is not anyting to play with!  Especially Elective,  PLASTIC SURGERY!!!! 

Please handle your health conditions with care and careful consideration before walking into the pre-op room. 

Know what you are getting yourself into.  And take every percaution possible. 

Listen to your doctor —it will save your life!

  Remember,  love yourself,  love your family—take care of yourselves!