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Archive for March, 2009

SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…I DONT WEAR SOCKS

I glady tell some people that I do not
wear socks!
My son teases me and says that is why your
feet “LOOK LIKE THAT!”

I love the summer!
I should have been born in the Tropics…
No….I mean it! Really!

I love to feel sun drenched!
I love to feel the warm sun…not the hot
midday sun…but the late afternoon sun
when you sit up under a tree and allow
yourself to feel that breeze and smell
the grass and summer plants and flowers…
with your eyes closed —suddenly you
can even “feel” the earth revolving! You can
hear the leaves on the trees being gently
tosseled by the warm summer winds.

Ah, yes…I love sand between my toes..
I love to see the tops of my feet and toes
become sun tanned…darker that it is
naturally….
I love the red tone my dark skin seems
to take on….
Yes, I truly enjoy SAND BETWEEN MY
TOES!

I remember when I first started working
in Manhattan when I was younger…

My days of walking the Manhattan streets
were fun…except I did not make
enough money to really shop in the
expensive stores…
However, I enjoyed watching the styles
and the people who did shop in those
stores, like Bloomingdales, Macys…etc.

But the Hot Hot streets of Manhattan with
their semi-melt black tar streets would
sometimes feel soft under my toes and
feet when I wore my favorite ballet
slippers as if they were real street shoes.
I loved to dance at that time…so I would go
to a dance studio and attempt to jump
around with “real” dancers in a modern
dance class. I would then leave the class
and afterwards find myself eating a frozen
yogurt from a frozen yogurt stand with
super sweet strawberries on top of my
vanilla frozen yogurt.
I walk down 7th Avenue past 42nd street…
all the way to 34th street and Penn station
and then board the E train to Queens…
the last stop.

I loved the feel of the Manhattan streets in
the summer.
The office workers looked carefree as they
sat watching all the pedestrians walk
by…..Men watching women, and women
talking engrossed in conversations as they
took slow walks back to their buildings to
end their day after lunch.
I know…I had been one of those women
too!
Yet still and all….I loved the City of New
York.
But I still love SAND BETWEEN MY TOES!

When I was about 16 I would go with my
mother to a wealthy woman’s home…Anne
Shaw.
She would rent a house in Fire Island on
Ocean beach.
I loved that place.
My mother would clean that rented home…
and I would walk from the Bay of Ocean
Beach ….on out to the more rough
ocean beach part of the area.
I would literally walk bare foot….I would
saunter down the cement streets…
without a care in the world.
I would wear only my bathing suit and
and smock over it.
I was so thin at the time I would wear
Danskin Leotards/bathing suits.
I had this rich burgandy colored one!
Oh how much I enjoyed those carefree
Days!
Sometimes…most of the time I would bring
my CELLO and play it on the deck of Ms.
Anne Shaw’s rented home that my mother
cleaned while I walked carefree.
I love…SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…
i DON’T WEAR SOCKS EITHER…AND i AM
NOT ASHAMED TO TELL YOU THAT!
i LOVE THE WARM SUMMER SUN, THE
SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…EVEN IF IT IS
ON THE BEACH, OR IN THE BEACH WATER…
i LOVE THE SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…
oH, TO GO BACK TO THOSE CAREFREE DAYS!

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YOU KNOW THE HEART HAS A MEMORY….

I have heard and read stories in the
news paper…”Not the Post”—but the Daily
News and Times about people who have
received heart transplants and begin to have
certain behaviors, likes and dislikes of the
owner of the heart that he/she received
in transplantation.

I often wonder..since I read that…what would
someone remember or what strong habits
do I have that would be remembered if I
were to become a heart donator?

My heart would remember my:
First Kiss from my mother when I was born?
My first kiss from my boyfriend when I was
pre-teen?
My first hug, first steps, first days of school
experiences?
My first love?
The day I received Jesus as My Lord and
Savior?
My first witness of who Jesus is in my
life after that Ephiany of Salvation?
My wedding day to my x-husband?
My realization that my husband had
left me the first time….the second time
and when he became tragically sick?
My first nights of sleeping alone in a bed
that I had shared with someone for ten
years.
My first time of loss from a companion who
I would never see again in life
My first look at my son and realize that he
had lost his father forever to a tragic
disease and who would not ever see his
father again.
My first time that my mother would tell me
that I have to go on for my son…and
focus my attention on the Lord and raising
my son without his father…
My first date with a man….two years after
we tragically lost my husband
My son’s first words, my son’s birthday
and how special that was
My son’s look and behavior that reminds
me of his father…
My life since I have learned to let go and
move forward from my fears and allow
God to lead me toward a new and
joyful life…

Yes….you know the HEART HAS A MEMORY
wHAT DOES YOUR HEART REMEMBER?

MAMMOGRAPHY FOLLOW UP….UGH!

I had to go to my 6 month follow up for
Mammography!

I was scared and nervous…what else is new?!

The weather was nice that day….but I was
still scared.

The tech was through and I got out at at
good time.

I am waiting the results.

Go GET YOUR MAMMOS DONE….LADIES..
GO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES!

Sincerely

The Power of Prayer and Timelessness

In life…it is hard to
sometimes find a
common ground
Sometimes meet in
that space and time
realm where
everything seems to
stop…
the world is put on hold
and you can leave that
worldly mold
and take hold
of another person
in the spirit
I like you.
Nothing more,
nothing less.
I like you….
Time was moving
for once I was not…
atleast for a
millisecond…
but only we knew…
It was surreal…
but peaceful
a moment in prayer
felt light a quick
eternity…
Lets meet in
prayer—again!
Prayer is more
concrete that
actual conversation…
more real than
that stupid arguement
you had yesterday…
Take that moment and
move forward into
the supernatural realm
of Prayer!

IN ALL THIS GIVE THANKS!

In my daily struggles…
I must give thanks…
Apostle Paul stated that
“I am cast down…but not destroyed…”
I have been through serious hurt and
serious physical pain….I have felt love,
romantic feelings, fear and sickness.
But even in all that…it is proven to me to
have faith, have love, and give thanks
in all of those trails!
I have awakened at 4am and found myself
tired of sleeping…my soul hungry for the
answer…I have walked my house…and
found myself full of fear that had me in
its’ grip. I would sit and pray, think and
ponder the issue and then cry.

I sometimes get in my car and drive.
I want to give thanks but sometimes it
is difficult to give thanks when it
hurts so bad. Agony is no joke.
So I always try to say “Lord have mercy
on my soul and then keep me nearer the
cross. Help me Lord, lift me up…from this
deep dark pit….pit of pain and misery…
Have mercy Lord Jesus…!
Let this pain or fear pass from me.
Sometimes I would have prayed and
grow sleepy and I climb the steps back
to my bed and fall back to sleep.
I awake in a better spirit.
I have received the Lord’s peace in my
sleep.
So when I have awakened I give thanks!
The situation may have stayed the same–
but I feel that I can cope a little better.
I feel a little less pain.
I feel a little less fear.
So IN ALL THIS GIVE THANKS!
The imediate answer to a prayer does not
always come the same day…or same year!
But the answer comes…yes the answer
comes.
All one has to do is to hold on to that
prayer, write in down in a book and keep
track of that!
Never feel despair….never give up…just
keep on holding on. Get others to pray
with you…believing that these things that
you have prayed for will happen.
Sometimes it may take years….I still do not
have a husband after all of these years.
I have been alone for 10 years. So if you
want to know how to cope with being
lonely….COUNT IT ALL JOY….AND IN ALL
THIS GIVE THANKS!
You need a job….COUNT IT ALL JOY AND
GIVE THANKS…YOU need better health
….give thanks, and count it all joy!

GIVE THANKS AND COUNT IT ALL JOY!
GIVE THANKS AND COUNT IT JOY
GIVE THANKS AND COUNT
GIVE THANKS, GIVE
GIVE THANKS

ICE

In my mouth I place a piece
of
ice….
eating it is refreshing
is it good for me?
I like to eat ice…
Middle age setting in?
Change of life?
Whatever, I feel refreshed
Ice….the polar ice cap,
polar bears, shards of ice,
ice sickles,
and ice cream
Oh, what a gentle dream
I love ice
Ice is cold,
but it is a force when rolling
around the ocean
it can lower ships
to Davy Jones Locker…
tossed water logged ship passengers
to their untimely deaths from
Titanic so many
many years ago.
ICE….
It is great is juice, or any beverage

But I just like the half moon shaped pieces
that are shallow, and light
They crunch ever so gently in my mouth..
The ice does sit too long in my mouth
so it is not too cold.
Ice is very, very nice!

DEEP

Your eyes penetrated me
Your words were soft and gentle
You stretched out your hand
and touched my
forehead
You prayed for me
You annionted me
You prayed for me
You blessed me
Down deep the prayer
was felt
Down deep the annionting
was received
Down deep prayer was received
Deep within my heart….I praised the
Lord ….for sending someone so
committed to helping others!
Deep is the truth, deep is the love
High above is the spiritual dove
Deep and wide…there is a “fountain flowing
deep and wide.
Come and enter –and
be revived….
DEEP