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With the Free CONDOMS….Do I get a free guest pass to the Motel Too?–Reflections on Free Condoms in the HighSchools!

LIFE STARTS HERE.jpgI understand the goal of the school system.  I just do not comprehend the where and the how of it all.  I am a Baby Boomer!  My mother was very strict and I did not have my first boyfriend until I was 21 years old. 

 Yep, you guessed it…Late Bloomer, Baby Boomer.  I was born in 1961!  The Kennedy Era….blacks were still being treated like 3rd class citizens and society was still quite “Judeo/Christian” in its ethics and views of the American Society and the global outlook on things strange and foreign. 

 So with all that being said,  I am still a child of the “strict Judeo Christian Ethic”  I do not like to have conversations ab0ut overt sex, sex play, or lifestyles.  What I mean is that I am considered a person who is quite conservative in my values on life in general.

  However,  I have been concerned only about the goals of myself as a mother and leader in my family.  My personal views do not involve the rights, or lack of rights of another person unless their rights impringe on my personal assumed or legal rights as it were. 

 So again I ask this silly, silly question,  Does the giving out of free condoms to highschool students come with free passes to the local motel,  a booklet on sex,  proper hygenic sex,  sex education, and levels of sex methods, and proper treatment of one’s sexual partner? 

Do not give a person socks without shoes!  The condom is only part of the equation as far as I am concerned.  But I guess the “Powers that Be”– believe that highschool kids have that mentality of “Where there is a will there is a way?”

  In a back alley,  a park,  their parent’s house or whatever location that would be demoralizing to both parties engaged in sexual intercourse in some illegal public place if they were to get caught in a compromising “position” by a representative of law and order (if you know what I mean.) 

So if condoms are being handed out….what about books,  proper cleaning of genital areas,  books on crabs, genital warts, sexual life choices,  sexually transmitted diseases, Aids awareness packets, and procreation booklets as well as the most difficult topic of all —–abortion. 

For as we all know…..the condom,  the spermicide, the gels, the sponges, the pills, the “bandaides that are placed out of sight on the female body” do not always work. 

The purchase of the condom can be done at any time.  The saving of a young life from disease, or date rape is more difficult.  Teaching teenages about respect of one’s partner, or “domestic violence”,  NO, MEANS NO, and  pregnancy should be a mandate in all United States schools. 

 My son learned about his body parts, and sexual organs in Grace Lutheran Church and School, in the 4th grade.  I was upset at first and I asked the principal “Why”?  Now?  He is so young…..I still wanted him to believe in Santa Claus and Charlie Brown, the Easter Bunny and all of those fun child like things! 

 But instead a religious school that I paid $300 per month to was teaching about God and his private parts!  Ugh!!!! I was not ready for my 10 year old to start that discussion. 

Look,  I am not a prude.  I grew up with alot of pets!  I have had dogs that we owned that procreated in our yard and then we would have to throw water on them with they got “stuck”. 

  My son grew up with dogs also.  He is now 14 years old.  He was Zero to 13 living with our pets.   He had seen the dogs stuck together in the yard and came running telling me that something was wrong with the two dogs.

  I ran to the embarressing scene only to find the dogs looking equally embarressed as I was.   I would deal with the dogs and then I was left with the discussion of what that was called, and how that happend….which to be honest….I have still not understood why that “sticking” thing happens with dogs….but anyway…I digress. 

 I just did not want my son to get ALL of the details at9.  I thought 12 years old was better.  But what caused me to relax was the great principal Mrs. Lloyd. 

 Mrs. Lloyd said to my very, very, anxious teary eyed face…..”Mrs. Riveroflifelisajoy,  Don’t you want your child to be aware of his body and his rights over his body? Just because we are Christian does not mean that we should be naive about our bodies,  and neither should our children. 

This class will help possibly prevent the child from being lured into a sex abuse issue,  do you understand?  We have to teach them, and that helps them to understand the dangers.  We do not want to frigthen the children,  we want to arm them with knowlege not ignorance.”  

 After that talk, I calmed down.  I thought about what she said.  I thought back on my own personal experiences, and I realized she was right. 

 So I say all that to say this…..SCHOOLS SHOULD GIVE MANY, MANY, MANY, VARIOUS COURSES ON SEXUAL EDUCATION.  Do not just teach what a condom is….tell what will happen if it is not used properly,  take the boys to the side and show proper application,  take the girls to the side and show the various sexual safety products like female condoms too. 

Let the schools hire trained professionals that will treat this teaching professionally, and respectfully.  No matter what the teenagers sexual preference….SAFE SEX MUST BE TAUGHT FROM  9TH GRADE THROUGH 12 GRADE. 

That might be a better option than JUST giving out a condom.  Safe sex and sex relations and sex products for procreation, and abortion/prolife should be held at the begining of the school term for atleast one week as part of the core curriculum. 

 Most of the ignorance is continued by lack of knowledge in the American Society and  country.  The United States is a Super Power……why are our children more aware of Disney World, Disney Land,  video games,  popular music and the like….but ignorant on their own bodies, the risks of sexual activity, the pros and cons of birth control, and pregnancy vs. prolife/prochoice?

I would hope that my voice will be heard.  Look,  if a religious school realizes how important it is for their students to have CONTROL over their bodies….because that control over one’s body actually does control one’s future and destiny…..why not let all schools create a program that will teach and do no harm?

  With proper guidance and education maybe our children, and their children’s children will have the option to decrease abortions,  aides, and domestic violence.  It will not solve the world’s problems, but it will be an assist to the world overall.

—–RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY

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SOMEBODY PLEASE TAKE THE TEMPERATURE OF AMERICA! It looks like the United States has caught OBAMA FEVER!!! HE IS A WINNER!!!!

big-summer-sky-at-dusk.jpgLook,  I am not a politics buff….but one thing I do know…..I heard 1010Wins  RADIO ROAD TO THE WHITE HOUSE,  state  that Hillary  Clinton is considering conceding defeat?!!!!

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 Whaaaaaattt?????!!!!  Impossible says I!  NOt to be believed says I!  Hillary Clinton could not possibly give in so easily? 

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 I was at a job related function yesterday and I heard  a several teachers, and a principal of a school discussing the issue.

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  Some were thinking over the experience issues between Hillary and Obama.  It was interesting to hear.  One person who was black did not seem so impressed with Obama’s experience. 

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 While another person who was also black,  was apparently happy about Obama’s  too close to the White House success in the primaries nationally! 

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 They then compared how Jessie Jackson had made a bid for the White House.  However, they then  considered that Jessie Jackson did not appeal to middle America in his stance on issues or his way of speech or both. 

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 They thought about it and bantered the topic,  but is was obvious who had Obama political fever and who did not. 

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 I sat there for a minute, since I was not directly in the conversation, and I did start to get a little bit in awe of the history taking place before our eyes, and ears! 

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My father was a World War II Veteran….my father cared for his wife and children.  My father brought a house in SpringfieldGardens that had a acre lot and a large bongalo house. 

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My dreams have been realized through the fact that my father dared to dream and dared to step out from his comfort zone!  So  dreamers can be success stories!  Ya know?

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 Mr. Obama,  I will definitely keep you, and Hillary Clinton in my prayers.  This is a momentous moment in time….savor it,  inhale it,  taste it! 

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 It tastes like a green meadow at sunrise, wet with the dew of promise after a  midnight of malstrom storms and thunderous clamor. 

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 Let that clamor and noise be the change of the century!

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  Let Obama and Hillary bring fourth a New Begining for the future of mankind and the world!

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Till next Hillary and Obama blog—

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—-RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY! 

“Molestation by a Minister”– (NON-Fiction story written by Riveroflifelisajoy) Now watch…—T.D. Jakes Movie Woman Thou Art Loosed! wATCH THIS MOVIE AND LEARN LIFE’S LESSONS!

LIFE STARTS HERE.jpgFirst Saturday 

The little girl was lead down the dark dank cement staircase into a large open room in the basement of a church.  It was not her church.  It was a church that she would come to for math tutoring.

   There were chairs  and tables set up in a circular patten.  The little girl was lead to a table with three chairs.  She sat down and began to open her books.  She was shy and withdrawn naturally. 

  A predator could smell her fear of the world a mile away.  She sent out the signals and the signals were received.  She however, did not realized that her quiet seven year old shyness was a attractive to the predator. 

Once the tutoring session began and the other students had taken their seats,  the pedator made his way from table to table.  He sat down,  or leaned over in a standing position toward the other students.

  The first day with his little victim/ or prey was simple and quiet.  He asked her questions about her school work and he observed her closely.  She was very,  very,  withdrawn and barely raised her voice  above a whisper.

  “Yes,  yes,” the predator thought to himself in deep internal excitement.  If the little girl had looked up from her work   she would have seen   the predator tutor’s eyes—; she would have seen the hungry gleam eminating from deep within his very soul and his eyes! 


But instead, as was her usual reaction to new places, and people,  she kept her head down.  Keeping her head down and barely talking above a whisper made the predator want to take action right then and there. 

 But wait,  he had to get his prey comfortable, and relaxed.  He could see her nervousness too.  So wait,  he told himself,  wait.

  Soon she will be mine.  The hour and one half was up.  The students all filed out of the dank old church basement, and up into the fresh air  and glided over to their waiting parents.

  The little prey walked timidly toward her mother along side her more fearless big sister.  The predator decided right then to separate the two sisters according to age and grade.

  Lucky for the predator,  the prey was the only 2nd grader in the tutoring program.  He would put her at a table all by herself.  She would never complain like the other kids.

  She is very docile….bendable,  and plyable too.  With every thought he grew more excited and could not wait for the next Saturday program. 

 What great plans he had for this new meat! 

 Second   Saturday

Once again the little girl was lead down the dark, dank cement church basement  steps for math tutoring with the minister.   He made an announcement to the students to sit at the desk where the age and grades were their own.  

 He  lead the shy prey to her and his personal singular table with two chairs.  One for him and one for her.  He sat his chair very,  very close to her.

He began to talk in low tones about her math.  He gave her some assignments and some math equations and went to the other students to assist them.  

He could barely keep his mind on his work.  He wanted to sit next to this shy little girl. 

 She was clean, and neat, and terrified of the world around her.  The predator tried to convince himself that he must calm down.  He must be patient.

  Once he had all of the other students working on computations, and english assignments,  he went back to his quietly waiting timid prey.  He sat next to her, and she inched over slightly away from him. 

 He began to talk to her and then he placed a hand every so gently on her thigh.  She jumped.  She glanced up at him slightly and then looked back at her school work.  Inside the pedator laughed to himself in glee.  The prey began to cry in a low whimper.

3 Weeks Later  on Monday

The little prey had become uneasy as her mother questioned her.  She began to cry.  Her sister had told her mother that she noticed something funny going on at the little prey’s tutuoring table. 

The mother took out dolls and  had the little prey act out anything that she could not say.  Once the entire story came out  the mother told her husband — the little prey’s father. 

 They decided to go to the police and also go to the church.  The little prey remembered, years later that she had experienced pain in her lower region,  pain so severe that she would squeeze her eyes shut so  as to block out the memory of the predator’s large fingers and what they had done to cause her such pain while she had tried to learn her math lessons! 

 She remembered the smell of the dank basement and the look of the predator;  she remembered his fingers, and finger nails that were neatly clipped and clean, but caused her extreme pain! 

She remembered his plain black minister’s suite and white collar,  and the whisper in her ear to be quiet,  and “don’t make noise, you do not  want to disturb the other students.” 

 The little prey remembered hearing her parents yelling at the top of their lungs after she dismissed and was sent to bed ….so that “grown folks could decide what to do. “

******* You see the problem was that the little prey was black, and the predator was white.  It was 1967 and racism was still alive and well in society.******* 

 Who would they,  (the church) believe?  The  white Minister of a respected very powerful religious organization,  or a 7 year old little black girl?

   The answer :   the minister was not arrested.  He promised to seek counseling.  The little girl stopped the math tutoring. 

The final outcome of the predator is unknown.  But the little girl went on to have problems in math forever, and ever  AMEN. 

The characters in this story are real.  The names have been omitted for obvious reasons. 

The movie by T.D. JAKES—WOMAN THOU ART LOOSED….pay homage to “little prey”  and her brothers and sisters who have been victimized  throughout history. 

Please watch your children closely,  watch the people around your children closely…..and try not to leave them unattended with any one at all.

Sincerely,

RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY 

Cooking CHEAP, HEALTHY, QUICK AND NATURAL THE EASY WAY!—((watch that salt and sugar too!)) January 6, 2008

duckies at play This is a serene picture, that a friend took many years ago.  I will always cherish this picture.  I always believe that a meal should be peaceful, and unrushed.  Tranquil…  so that the meal gets digested properly.  Relax and   enjoy… I have a treat for you.  Quick,  healthy meal ideas from Riveroflifelisajoy!

Often people ask me to cook for school functions.  I do not offer food for those  occasions. 

 Why you might ask?  Well my mother always cooked very, very simply because my father was a diabetic. 

I do not have a special meal that people rave about….you know what I mean….don’t you?

  So I go to my old stand by….Italian Pastry!  I go to Sapiensia’s Excuse the spelling.

My favorite Italian Pastry is Connolly’s!  (spell check )  I love those…especially  when placed in the cake.

  The cake is vanilla with connolly creme inside and white or chocolate frosting.  This cake I like to purchase for family birthdays! 

It is my terrible little treat….once in a while….pssst but don’t tell anybody!!! LOL!!!!  

I also like another pastry called lobster tail!  That is great too.    I also love a certain other little treat  during the summer  the REAL CHOCOLATE CHIP CONNOLLY ICES!  YUMMY!!!! 

 And  all other natural fresh and delicious icey treats.  I love this stuff!  I do not generally buy junk food for my house.  I do not buy chips too much.  My italian pastry treat is about once every 4 or 5 months or so.  I am not a bing  or secret eater type person….Ya know?

But I love juices.  I love GREEN TEA by TURKEY HILL.  I know,  I know….maybe to much sugar right?  Probably so.  So  I have to cut back on the Green Tea….but it is so REFRESHING!

  I also love Welches Grape Juice.  Grape juice is also good for cleaning your blood with the antioxidents as well. 

I was told to go to Flushing Queens to get the REAL GREEN TEA LEAVES in stead of buying the premade stuff.

  Problem…there is difficulty parking and I would like a suggestion of how to locate the place that sells the REAL Green Tea leaves.

LIPTON TEA MIX HAS  a good GREENTEA MIX… —now that is not very sweet at all.  I think you would have to put the whole dry mix into your pitcher to get that over sweet taste. 

Every culture has it’s “staple” foods. 

 For example some cultures use rice,  or pasta as the basic staple of every meal.  some cultures use flavorings that are totally recognizable to that ethnic group.  Well,  I am African American. 

 But I do not know how to cook those culturaly known meals at all!  Suprised?  Don’t be.

  My parents knew and lived cultural diversity before it became the”IN THING”! 

My mother’s best friend lived with my family from the time I was five years old   until I was fourteen.  Irene passed away when I was fourteen. 

  My father was a practical nurse, and my mother was a stay at home wife.

  My mothers’s friend Irene was Irish American.  She had personal issues that she could not resolve so her children stayed with their father and she lived with us. 

 Irene was a wealth of knowledge of the fine arts,  food,  and creativity!  She and my mother would set about to decorate my parents house every six months!

  Irene and my mother with my fathers financial backing opend up a store on Jamacia Avenue in South East Queens called for Antiques and What Nots!  

Irene also worked in the Post Office, so she would contribute to the household and assist my parents with the bills. 

My mother and Irene were like Lucy and Ethel from the “I love Lucy Show”—they always had creative ideas (((back in the 60’s—that’s right! 

 A black woman and a white woman were best friends!— I did learn so much from that diverse family experience that I will always cherish and never forget!)))

 My family was very middle  class because my father kept two practical nursing jobs from the time I was born, until he died from diabeties at the age of 59.

 So I was fortunate enough to have a happy early start in life.  But my mother did not cook…traditional African American food! 

   My mother was raised as a Seventh Day Adventist!  They do not eat P0rkor pork by products!  They are similar to the Jewish belief in that they keep the Sabbath Holy and do not injestany pork at all.

  If you know anything about the south, a lot of meals are cooked using pork.  Vegetables –especially greens.  I never ate greens or collard greens with pork flavoring until I was an adult and attended a party! 

 My mother did not even make macaroni and cheese.  Not even fried Chicken!   I grew up eating the Irish Ham,  steak, chicken,  steamed, or boiled vegetables, and white mashed potatoes!  Funny— huh!

So read my receipes for simple meals….Please do not expect Soul food from me!  But do understand….I am asking around and people are giving me the receipes to make good macaroni and cheese,  or brown sugar kernal corn.  I will tell you how it goes!

Tonights meal:

Fried fish and onions with egg noodles and vegetables!

How to of Riveroflifelisajoy Fried Fish:

Ingredients:

1 egg

1 cup of “America’s Choice Italian Style Bread Crumbs ( Waldbaums Brand)

4 “Captain Bob Whiting Fillets”   (frozen)  cut up two inches  a piece

1 third of the frying pan  filled with America’s Choice Vegetable Oil (Waldbaums  Brand)

1 large onion cut up in 1 inch slices

How to:

First, pour the  cracked open egg (yolk and all) over the cut up fillets.

Mix and cover all of the fish thoroughly.  Then pour the 1 cup of America’s Choice Italian Style Bread Crumbs over the fish and mix well with a fork. 

 All of the fish should be covered in bread crumbs.

After heating up your frying pan on low,  gently place the fish nuggets in the pan and cover with a lid.  Let brown on each side. 

After the fish nuggets have a golden tint place the chopped up onion in with the fish nuggets.  Keep the flame on low a bit longer. 

While this is cooking,  get a sauce pan and bring 2 cups of water to a boil.  Take one cup of  America’s Choice egg   noodles and place in the pan/pot.  Let boil in the water for 5 minutes. 

 Take a bag of frozen mixed America’s Choice vegetables  and pour one cup of vegies in the pot! 

Whala!

In about 10 minutes you have noodles and veggies swirling around each other. 

 After they are completely cooked,  drain and then put in a bowl.

  Pour the America’s Choice Tomato Sauce over the veggies and noodles!

While veggies and noodles are complete—check your fried fish!

The onions should be browning lightly.  The fish can be cooked until crispy! 

Notice….the only salt added to this meal is the salt in the Bread Crumbs which is 430mg!

Also the other salt added to this meal is the Tomato Sauce which is 580mg!

Wow!  That is high for salt isn’t it!

So to decrease your salt intake….You might monitor your salt and look for LOW SALT bread crumbs,  and LOW SALT tomato sauce too. 

I do not add any salt on my own….and I feel that  salt in this meal is way over the limit even for me!

What do you think?

I will keep adding to this blog.

I will let you know of  the next dinner that I create!—Remember Low Budget…does not mean tastless meals!

I have to cook short quick meals…because after a long day at work….my energy is very low.  So I use pasta and vegetables.  I also use alot of brown rice.

  I love salad…which I did not discuss today.  I like fresh green kale or spinarch. 

 I do not buy canned vegetables.. I generally get the quick frozen veggies instead at Waldbaums.  Waldbaums always has a sale—like 10 packages for $10.00!   Great for the single parent on a limited income!  Excellent for life on a shoe string!

 I try to stay with foods that have salt naturally from nature….not additives.

Hope your cooking is cheap, healthy quick and easy!

Till next blog entry…

Riveroflifelisajoy!