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MIDDLE PASSAGE AND THE MEMORIES OF A SLAVE~~~Fiction by Riveroflifelisajoy

Ma name is John Smith.

Ah, been in dis here plantation since a

was a young chile..sold offin’

my Mama befo’ I was ten.

But Ah memba’ my Mama face

and my Mama hands.

My Mama face wuz brown

tired and sad. 

She wore a ole’ faded

red head rag.   She would

take me wid her to clean

the chicken coups

and feed the cows.

Ah would play and chase

the chickens!

One day the master

of  da house came and

picked me out from

ma friends and told

my Mama it wuz time

fo’ me to go!

I wuz too big to

be playin’ anymo’.

The master sent ole’

Joe, the helper to carry me off

to the market to be

sold. 

Ah cried and kicked and

screamed fo’ my

Mama. 

She just stood a lookin’

after me and did not

move to help me!

Ah watched my Mama

grow tiny as the horse,

cart  pulled me and the otha’ slaves who

was packed into it away from

my birth plantation to a

new and dangerous beginin’!

Ah wuz sold to the Williams.

Mr. Williams was kind, but

his son was the mean one.

He liked to beat slaves fo’ nuthin’

and then leave um to die if they

put up a fuss.

He would jus’ buy mo’

slaves the next day.

The Williams plantation

was a cotton plantation.

Hard work, pickin’ cotton,

cuts up yo’ hands and stuff.

Ah grew big and strong.

I could carry three times my weight

on a good day.

So young master Williams took

good care uh me. 

But ah hated ta see

my friends suffer so.

One day we heard of the

UNDERGROUND RAILROAD.

Ah  decided to run awa’.

No, Ah told ye, that Master Williams

wuz good to me.  Ah just wanted to see

my Mama so bad.

Ah did not care about good treatment.

Ah wanted to be free! 

Ah made a chance run fo’ it

one night.

Ah wuz tryin’ ta meet

up wid the UnderGround RailRoad

in the forest.

Ah, made a mistake.

I told ole’ Buck, who curries the

Master’s horses.  He warn’ me

not to try it!  Ah, told him to minds his business!

I could out run any dog, or horse….cause the master

fed me the best food cause ah carried the heavy loads and pulled

plows when the horses went lame.

Sos’  I think that is why I wuz caught so fast.

When they draggs’ me back to the

plantation, there was ole’ Buck a lookin’

at me.  From a distance he kept gettin’

bigger, and bigger.  He stood right at

the wipping post and look at me….just starin’

and shaking his ole’ grey head.

When they tied me up I could see dried

blood where other slaves had been beat.

It wuz a cloudy day.

It wuz a hot night.

They found me in the day and wup me

deep into da night.

Young Master Williams took a break

from his workin’ my back, and

then told his workers to continue on

till the next mornin’ just wupin’

my back.

I stop yellin’ and then I don’t

member nothin after dat.

All I know is that I found ma’self

sittin up here wit Jesus, and da

Angels.

Oh, and I found Mama too!

Except  she got a big smile on

huh face, and she wearing a white

dress and she don’t look tired no’ mo’.

Fini~~~

Fiction Depiction of Slavery

by Riveroflifelisajoy

Pat Buchanan–“Did he state that Black Americans should be Thankful for Slavery?—What Year is this Again? 2008?!!”

 

 QUOTED FROM E.POLITICS.COM… REGARDING REMARKS OF PAT BUCHANAN

“America has been the best country on earth for black folks. It was here that 600,000 black people, brought from Africa in slave ships, grew into a community of 40 million, were introduced to Christian salvation, and reached the greatest levels of freedom and prosperity blacks have ever known. “

I DO NOT GENERALLY TAKE OTHER WRITS ON THE INTERNET—BUT THIS STRUCK ME SO HARD THAT I HAD TO GIVE MR.  COLIN DELANY ANOTHER  AREA IN WHICH TO VENT.  IT WOULD APPEAR THAT MR. PAT BUCHANAN SEEMS TO FEEL THAT PEOPLE OF THE AFRICAN AMERICAN HERITAGE ARE TO BE THANKFUL FOR THE “BENEFITS” OF SLAVERY IN AMERICA.  

I RECENTLY VIEWED THE MOVIE  “AMAZING GRACE”, AN HISTORIC MOVIE ABOUT THE BATTLE HELD IN ENGLAND BY WILLIAM WILLBERFORCE,  A MERCHANT WHO BEING IN POLITICS AT THE TIME FOUGHT AGAINST SLAVERY, HAVING BEEN INFLUENCED BY HIS PASTOR, JOHN NEWTON, ( A REFORMED  SLAVE TRADER WHO WROTE THE FAMED “AMAZING GRACE” HYM THAT EVERYONE TAKES FOR GRANTED). 

 THE EVENT TOOK PLACE, ACCORDING TO THE MOVIE REVIEW WRITTEN BY REV. BRYAN GRIEM “OVER TWO CENTURIES” AGO–DURING THE TIME BETWEEN THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION AT THE END  OF THE THE FRENCH REVOLUTION.” (1 MOVIE REVIEW- CHRISTIAN SPOLIGHT.COM)

THIS MOVIE WAS TOUCHING,  AND MADE ME REALIZE THAT NOT ALL EUROPEANS WERE FOR THE SLAVE TRADE.  YES, THERE WERE THE REFORMED SLAVE TRADERS….BUT THAT ENGLAND HAD RENOUNCED THE SLAVE TRADE BEFORE AMERICA …IS THOUGHT PROVOKING TO SAY THE LEAST.  I HAD NEVER THOUGHT OF ENGLAND HAS HAVING ANY COMPASSION, OR HUMAN  AWARENESS THAT THE SLAVE TRADE WAS WRONG…ON SO MANY LEVELS.  ——-BUT YET,  HERE TWO CENTURIES FROM THAT DATE…..HERE IS PAT BUCHANAN TELLING BARAK OBAMA AND HIS ***NEGATIVE ****BASED ALLEGED MINISTER MR.  WRIGHT,  THAT (ALTHOUGHT HIS STATEMENTS WERE INAPROPRIATE)  THAT MR. WRIGHT SHOULD BE THANKING G-D FOR SLAVERY?  

I WONDER IF WILLIAM WILBERFORCE HAD READ OR HEARD PAT BUCHANAN’S RATHER SHALLOW,  LIMITED VIEWS ON HUMAN ENSLAVEMENT—WOULD HE HAVE AGREED?  I THINK NOT!!!! 

IN THE MOVIE, AMAZING GRACE,  JOHN NEWTON,  STATED THAT THE SLAVES WERE NOT THE ANIMALS,  THE SLAVE TRADERS WERE THE BARBARIANS.  THEY ABUSED, MISUSED,  MURDERED,  RAPED, ETC., ETC., ETC., THE CAPTIVE AFRICANS  DURING THE “MIDDLE PASSAGE FROM AFRICA  TO ENGLAND, AMERICA AND OTHER PORTS OF CALL. 

HOW COULD PAT BUCHANAN MAKE SUCH A COLD, SICK STATEMENT THAT SLAVERY WAS GOOD?   IF IT WAS SO GOOD….WHY DID THE  X-SLAVE TRADER JOHN NEWTON WRITE THAT HYM “AMAZING GRACE”  EXPLAINING HOW HE HAD BEEN WRONG FOR HIS ACTIONS AND REALIZING THE LOVE OF GOD INSPITE OF HIS OWN EVIL ACTIONS TOWARD OTHER HUMANBEINGS.  EVEN IF SOMEONE LOOKS, SMELLS, LIVES, ACTS DIFFERENT THAN YOU AS A HUMANBEING

….DOES THAT GIVE YOU THE SUPREME RIGHT TO DEMORALIZE THAT HUMAN BEING?   I THINK NOT…..THUS THAT BEAUTIFUL HYMN “AMAZING GRACE”  AND THE MAN WILLIAM WILBURFORCE WAS BORN TO FIGHT THE INJUSTICE OF SLAVERY AND THEN  WIN  IN ENGLAND…SETTING THE STAGE FOR THE  CHANGE TO TAKE PLACE IN AMERICA.

IS PAT BUCHANAN STATING BASICALLY THAT BLACKS OR ANY OTHER PEOPLE OF BROWN, OR YELLOW SKIN WOULD NOT,  COULD NOT HAVE BEEN A PART OF TODAYS SOCIETY WERE IT NOT FOR THE SO CALLED BENEFITS OF SLAVERY?

   IS HE SO LIMITED ON WORLD HISTORY AND ANTHROPOLOGY AND THE STUDY OF HUMAN PSYCHO BEHAVIOR THAT HE WOULD DECIDE THAT TO HARM AN ENTIRE RACE OF PEOPLE BY ABUSE, AND ENSLAVEMENT IS BETTER SO THAT THEY COULD BE TRAINED,  EDUCATED, AND CIVILIZED?

MY  COLLEGE COURSES CONTAINED SOME AFRICAN AMERICAN HISTORY AND THE SLAVE TRADE.  THERE WERE NO BENEFITS TO SLAVE TRADE.  I AM THE FIRST GENERATION WITHIN MY MOTHER’S FAMILY TO ATTEND COLLEGE,  AND MY MOTHER ATTEMPTED TO FINISH COLLEGE, BUT FAMILY CONCERNS TOOK THE CENTER STAGE IN HER LIFE. 

 WHY DIDN’T MY MOTHER GO TO COLLEGE BACK IN THE THIRTIES?  MY MOTHER”S FATHER WAS UNEDUCATED, AND SO WAS HER MOTHER.  THEY COULD READ ENOUGH TO CLEAN, OR DO BASIC WORK IN DOMESTIC LOCALS.  SO WHERE IS MR. BUCHANAN GETTING HIS BASIS TO JUSTIFY HIS THOUGHTS ON THE BENEFITS OF SLAVERY?

   WHY ARE SO MANY BLACK AND LATINO PEOPLE NOT HAS SUCCESSFUL AS THEIR COUNTERPART AMERICAN’S?  THIS TOPIC WOULD TAKE ME SEVERAL IF NOT HUNDREDS OF BLOG SPACE TO ADDRESS.

ANY HOW,  PLEASE TAKE A LOOK AT THE MOVIE CALLED, AMAZING GRACE , FEATURING:

  • IOAN GRUFFUDD
  • ALBERT FINNY
  • BENEDICT GUMBERBATCH
  • MICHAEL GAMBON
  • RAMOLA GARAI

DIRECTED BY MICHAEL APTED

DISTRUBED BY SAMUEL GOLDWYN

PLEASE READ THE FOLLOWING OPEN LETTER TO PAT BUCHANAN FROM

A WHITE MALE NAMED  “COLIN DELANY” AT e.politics.com

AND THEN CONSIDER “THE BENEFITS OF SLAVERY” ACCORDING TO MR. BUCHANAN—THANK YOU…riveroflifelisajoY

SOMEBODY PLEASE TAKE THE TEMPERATURE OF AMERICA! It looks like the United States has caught OBAMA FEVER!!! HE IS A WINNER!!!!

big-summer-sky-at-dusk.jpgLook,  I am not a politics buff….but one thing I do know…..I heard 1010Wins  RADIO ROAD TO THE WHITE HOUSE,  state  that Hillary  Clinton is considering conceding defeat?!!!!

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 Whaaaaaattt?????!!!!  Impossible says I!  NOt to be believed says I!  Hillary Clinton could not possibly give in so easily? 

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 I was at a job related function yesterday and I heard  a several teachers, and a principal of a school discussing the issue.

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  Some were thinking over the experience issues between Hillary and Obama.  It was interesting to hear.  One person who was black did not seem so impressed with Obama’s experience. 

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 While another person who was also black,  was apparently happy about Obama’s  too close to the White House success in the primaries nationally! 

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 They then compared how Jessie Jackson had made a bid for the White House.  However, they then  considered that Jessie Jackson did not appeal to middle America in his stance on issues or his way of speech or both. 

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 They thought about it and bantered the topic,  but is was obvious who had Obama political fever and who did not. 

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 I sat there for a minute, since I was not directly in the conversation, and I did start to get a little bit in awe of the history taking place before our eyes, and ears! 

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My father was a World War II Veteran….my father cared for his wife and children.  My father brought a house in SpringfieldGardens that had a acre lot and a large bongalo house. 

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My dreams have been realized through the fact that my father dared to dream and dared to step out from his comfort zone!  So  dreamers can be success stories!  Ya know?

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 Mr. Obama,  I will definitely keep you, and Hillary Clinton in my prayers.  This is a momentous moment in time….savor it,  inhale it,  taste it! 

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 It tastes like a green meadow at sunrise, wet with the dew of promise after a  midnight of malstrom storms and thunderous clamor. 

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 Let that clamor and noise be the change of the century!

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  Let Obama and Hillary bring fourth a New Begining for the future of mankind and the world!

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Till next Hillary and Obama blog—

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—-RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY! 

A WOMAN’S WORK IS NEVER, EVER DONE! My thoughts on working overtime and its affects on family, and health–riveroflifelisajoy

duckies at playMost Americans work a stated 40 hour work week.  But then this thing called overtime kicks in.  UGH!   and double ugh!

  I am of victim of this overtime dilemma.  You work it either because you have to, or because you need the money.  But what happens when you come on and the house is a wreck,  your feet hurt,  your back hurts,  and all you want to do is lay down.

  Problem with laying down for a few minutes you suddenly find youself being awaken by the hunger of the family and the second job now is upon you. 

Your family needs your attention…..NOW!  yOU PULL your aching bones from the bed and feel dizzy, weak and  tired.  You make dinner and then your child tells you he needs construction paper from the store. 

 You suddently find yourself at a 24 hour STOP AND SHOP SUPERMARKET,  looking at multicolored paper and wishing you were back in your bed

 The clock is spinning fast now.  You realize that 4a.m. and 5 a.m. are just around the corner.  Inside you want to cry….you wonder will you make it to retirement? 

 You wonder if you will make it to June at this point.  You get back home and then you look around the house and then begin to plan out the house cleaning. 

But wait….you go lay down….just for a minute…and suddenly it is 5 30 a.m.!  You are half an hour from being late.  YOu jump up from bed and then rush to prepare breakfast for the family.  

Take your shower and then run out the door to start this hard work force routine again. 

But atleast today is Friday….but oh,  You have to work 4hours and 30 minutes on Saturday morning!  Ugh!…Don’t think about it right now.  Just go one minute,  and one day at a time. 

 Focus….for you know the old saying….a “woman’s work is never done—she works from sun to sun!”

Lets analyize the workforce and how it affects the woman and her health….and the need to earn income vs.  being a mother and care giver. 

   Entry will be made later today…….It is 5am and I have got to get ready for work!  Write to you after my work day is complete! 

Riveroflifelisajoy! ————-

Well,  I ‘m back.

Work as a definition is something you have to do, and/or want to do  in order to get paid, or complete some type of task that benefits yourself or others.   Work is good….work is healthy.

  But too much of anything is never good.  As a woman I was persmitted to take a year of maternity leave after I gave birth to my only child.  However, due to conditions beyond my control  I have been a single parent for nearly 10 years to date. 

 I do not like it and it can be a double job at times.  (especially since my child has been having varied serious medical problems.)  I bear my burdens completely solo.  I care for my mother also. 

Thus I am sandwiched between two different circumstances—or rather three.  I am thankful for the job….but not having assistance at home makes it difficult to say the least.  For example,  one day I had to work overtime on my job. 

But when I arrived home,  I heard banging in the house.  My mother,  was calling my child.  He was in the basement.  He had been boiling an egg and fell asleep.  He burnt the pot he was cooking in and was sleeping in the smokey house.

  My mother was upstairs and could not walk down to the basement because of the arthritisis in her knees.  That conditon had the potentical to be devastating to say the least.  So I tried to stop doing overtime.  However,  I am unable to at this time. 

 A standing order is in place for my child not to cook at all unless I am in the house. Tunafish, and peanut butter and jelly are left in place for him to eat when I am not home.  Or–microwave oven also…But even that I do not trust too much either. 

You might ask,  where is your family and friends?  Well, I am not the “Lucy and Ethel” type gal!   Everyone I know has a job….and/career.  There are no stay at home mom’s in my daily life struggles. 

 Money is tight and people do not help out like that without hard green money in their hands.  So,—I do not have people walking in and out of my house.  Therefore,  I do not have assistance. 

 I even had attempted to get my mother a home attendant and VISITING NURSE SERIVCE of   New York resfused her several times in the past two years.

  You just about have to need a hospice before they offer you assistance.

  If  she can bathe herself, and feed herself,  they say that she is not eligable.  CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?

Thus back to my original discussion…..a WOMAN’S work is never done!

What are the society politicians doing to help the single parent,  caregivers of society? 

I get rediculed,  and repremanded on my job for my support of my mother and child.  I am told to make arrangments to have my child taken care of and my mother for that matter. 

But where is the money coming from to foot the bill to help PAY  for these so called arrangements?—-Strange huh?!

THIS WAS ANOTHER INSTALLMENT….BUT HOUSE CLEANING CALLS….!—-

RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY!

FOND MEMORIES OF MY FATHER DURING THE HOLIDAYS AND BEYOND!

LIFE STARTS HERE.jpgToo often it has been stated that black men are not there for their children,  or men in general are slacking off from their responsibilities.  I have a different perspective.

 My father was a WWII African American Veteran.  He was on the front lines of  that war,  from the way he described it to me when I was a kid. 

I used to love to listen to  him tell stories about work,  or some about the Army Reserve. 

My father had been given a waiver and also given a license to practice as a Practical Nurse when he came out of the service of the United States Army.

  He  became an Army Reservist.  He was a Sgt.  in the Army Reserve. When I was a child he would take me to the Army off of Atlantic Avenue in Brooklyn, NY.  I used to love it there during the Christmas  Holiday!  That place was so gigantic to a small child. 

I would run and play amongst the army tanks, and jeeps!  I loved the smell of the gasoline, and heavy metal vehicals.  That was my second home when my father would take me there for parties, to get my gift from “Santa.”!  

  Upstairs in the rooms where the party with Santa was held, there were so many rooms.  The other children and I would sneak from “secret room to secret room” until our parents would call us to come sit on Santa’s lap!  My father would always know everybody there. 

 When I think back,  I did not know what “racism” was until I got into my teens.  My father was friendly with every army reservist there!  There was laughter, and jokes and smiles,  pats on the back and introductions to the other families and their children! 

 I recently found a letter from him to my mother when he was on Army Reserve upstate at Camp Drum.  This letter had been written in 1960’s.  He was telling my mother to pick up his check from the hospital where he worked. 

 He also said that he missed her at the end of his letter.  That was touching to me because it seem that when became severely overcome by diabetes his attittude had changed toward my mother. 

 He eventually passed  when I was 21 years old, from an enlarged heart, and kidney failure.  He suffered trememdously  from  diabetes! 

 I remember watching my father give himself a needle in the stomach.  He had been put in the hospital a couple of times. 

But one thing I noticed about my father, was that he refused to stay home from work.  He went to work everyday. 

He had two jobs.  He worked in what was then called Brooklyn Jewish Hospital,  and Creedmoor Children’s Hospital.

  He would leave for work at 10:00 p.m. and not return home until the next day at 5:00p.m.  My mother would have dinner prepared,  he would take his shower and go straight to bed. 

 He never got many hours of sleep at home. He worked in the Emergency Room at Brooklyn Jewish Hospital at night.  He worked at Creedmoor Children’s Hospital during the day. 

He provided a large bungalo house with a big yard for his family.  My mother called him a WORKAHOLIC!!

His major concern was  that my mother provide him with clean clothes, and dinner.  He could handle the rest. 

On the weekend my father would take me to the park after he had had some sleep. 

He would make sure I had done my chores and then the rest of the afternoon was my time with him!  He loved to play handball with people he had met in the park while I ran around with my friends at the  playground. 

 I never had a bad experience at that park in Cambria Heights Queens NewYork!  As I got older the movies with Bruce Lee came out and my father and I truly enjoyed everyone of those on Saturdays.  

 I remember seeing “Enter the Dragon and a whole host of other movies!”  I became so involved that I started buying Karate Magazine and my father  enrolled me in the Jerome Mackey Karate School. 

 I took up judo!  The Karate Teacher looked very mean and he yelled alot.  So I took judo instead.  I loved being tossed about. 

Except for one time that my judo partener  did a move I did not expect and tossed me so hard that my bottom lip slid across the canvas mat. 

 My feelings were hurt and I never returned to that judo class again. 

 You see,  I loved the sport….but I was a bit shy,  and did not really like the violent part. 

 But  looking back now I realize how I must have had a deep crush on Bruce Lee,  because when he died I was heart broken—for a long while. 

 I read the book on his life and death.  I met my husband when I was 28 and don’t you know it —my husband had two black belts?

  I was shocked.  He had a black belt in IKEJUJITSU  and Korean Karate—oh,  and he also had a black belt in sword, and weapons fighting too

  I was floored,  and excited that I was marrying someone who had such skill.

—-Getting back to my father,  he purchased an above ground five foot 20 or more round swimming pool which he very rarely used himself.

  It was for the family –and he worked so he was more interested in sleeping!  My father allowed my mother to express herself in decorating.

  He even assisted her in opening up an antique shop on Jamacia Avenue in 1965! 

  He was a special man and He was a SPECIAL BLACK AFRICAN AMERICAN MAN!!!!   

  In closing I would like to state that we must remember the good in aALL MEN!!

  No one is perfect.  But try to remember the best in the people you have met.  There are always opportunities to build up your husbands and fathers. 

 Let’s try to decrease some of the negative press against the Black/African American Men,  and Men of ALL RACES for that matter. 

Show a man in your life that you care, and that you appreciate the kind and good things that they do for you.

    It is always easy to find the weaknesses and the errors—But for the sake of your children build up their selfesteem by being role models that they will remember up until they are middle age 47 year old  woman like myself.

  What you do today will defintely last a life time, and will go to the next generation after you are gone! 

 Enjoy the Holidays, and keep safe!

I am Not my Mother: The Desparity of Black Family Income to White Family Income–Does it Really Matter?

duckies at playI grew up in a house hold that was definitely black middle class.  But what happened to me?  Why am I doing so badly? 

My IQ is suffering here.  I just read  information according to the Stanford News Release from 1994 which is a kind of interesting look back to the attitudes of that time period.  I found  the “Bell Curve” discussion and how it relates to the black income and the white income based on intelligence. 

Well,  my black husband became Paranoid Skizophrenic—-That stupid taboo disease that people are afraid to talk about!  Mental illness tends to strike a cord of laughter in some people —BLACK OR WHITE!!!—

I am not my mother relates to the life that she was living when  she was 47 and the life I now live at 47 years old.  I am severely financially strapped!   I am on definite hard times!  But is it because I have a Low IQ?  

 I attended and completed 69 Credits at Queens College and then  attended  Nyack College to fill in the total number of 128 credits to accomplish my bachelors degree.   I have only 3 more Life Experience essays to complete my Bachelor of Science in Organizational Managment. 

I completed my course work for the major Organizational Management.  I wrote a thesis called “How to Increase Productivity of Related Service Providers and Teaching Staff of the ABC School. ”  The thesis had a power point presentation, and a 28 question survey that I computed the tally of the information of  those people who took the survey.  After I completed the graphs I had over 100 pages of thesis.  I received an A-.  I did all this while working a full time –40 hour work week and caring for my elderly mother, and my son.  

 The essays are only for the completion of electives which can be on any topic so long as it displays “LEARNING ACHIEVED ACADEMICALLY.” 

 I play instruments and I write music.  But that does not put food on the table.  My day job puts food on the table!  But it is not enough money! 

I have good health benefits—but not enough cash flow for entertainment,  food,  utilities,  and even  nessecities. 

I have been getting my food at the food pantry too for the past few weeks.  (Food Pantry are several  a local churches  that receive donations and give it out to the general public in the community.)  No proof of need required.  

I am scared every second because of the rise in the gasoline prices,  food prices,  sneaker prices(for my son),  even sanitary napkins draw fear from my heart!   EVERY THING IS EXPENSIVE!!!  My son, my mother and myself use a expensive Scott  Toilet paper!!!! 

 My  problem is that I have 19 years on my job.  To start all over is  not a good idea for me at this time.

** PROBLEM  FOR THOSE IQ CHALLENGED:  My little family has medical problems.

Remember I am a black woman,  over weight,  gaped toothed,  prematurely grey, and pleasant enough. 

 But then is my problem>—IS MY IQ HOLDING ME BACK FROM COMING UP TO SOLUTIONS TO MY FINANCIAL DILEMA?

  Who will help me—this poor black talented  woman who plays a classical instrument (the cello), writes prose,  and poetry,  short stories, and has written copyrighted songs. 

I want help but every body comes with some type of  strings attached ,  or will not help without a dollar to be paid from my pocket to theirs. 

 So I can not move to another job—until my life gets stable!—Stability is based on the medical condition of my son and my  mother!

  Before we get to the desparity between my white counter part Baby Boomers–let us see the desparity between my mother and me–so you will not confuse us.

My mother lived in her house for nearly 40 years.  I lived in my house for only 4 years.  I had a house with three kitchens,  two full bathrooms, and  1 bathroom with a shower in the basement. 

I had a black top driveway and a tennant that lived up on the second floor and a great amount of loving pets….Now all gone from my life.  My mom was an anmal lover and my Dad allowed her to have cats and dogs!!! 

My Mom was a house wife!!!  I was only home when my son was born for 11 months .  Afterward I went back to work I started looking for my first house.

  But lost it in four years!–Of course due to my husband’s illness. 

 My father did have diabetes….but it never prevented him from working.  My father was well known for being a work horse!!! 

 My father took his diabetes medicine by needle in his stomach.  But he still jumped up at 9pm and got to work so he could provide for his family. 

 My husband became so separated from reality that he thought my son and I were not his original wife and child—we were imposters as far as he was concerned! Due to the skizophrenia,  my husband became missing from our lives for nearly ten years now. Truly a tragic situation!

 My mother  attended political functions all the time.  She was get dressed up  in sequin gowns and go to dinner dances of the elected officials when I was a kid. 

I on the other hand do not go out to dinner unless it is I – Hop,  once in a while TGIFridays maybe every two years.  I never get invited to go to any place because people know that I cannot afford a nice dress, or new shoes!  I do not even own a pair of earrings! 

  Look my money pays the rent, etc.  So I take care of my family….What else new? 

So  mainly the disparity starts between me and my mother….MAYBE MY MOTHERS IQ IS HIGHER THAN MIND?!!! 

  My father was a black  WWII veteran.  Imagine how difficult that must have been.  He became a waivered Practical Nurse….on the front lines—that means he could do minor surgery—like stitch up a wound or something. 

I saw my father in action.  He did minor surgery on  my dog one time after the dog got cut on our hurricane fence while playing with the next door neighbor’s dog!  My father stitched the dog—no infections no vet visit!!! Amazing!!!  So where were his  African American IQ issues?!!!  —

My father kept two jobs at all times.  He used his nursing skill in a hospital emergency room,  and also in a children’s hospital during the day!  My father was also are Army Reservist Sgt.  in the Brooklyn Army off off Atlantic when I was a kid.

  My father died of diabetes when I was 21 years old.  I am 47 years old today—and I am a failure in comparison to him.  He held two jobs,  and owned his own house with the two car garage, and swiming pool too! 

 The house was big and bright and cheery!  I have in the opposite—I do not even have living room furniture at this point.  I have decent beds for the family.  But the high price of a couch is just to much for me on my own.  I cannot get a loan from any where because of  bankruptcy due to my single parent status,  no child support status from a missing  sick husband!!! 

So I guess my failure is that I am well educated but some how not functioning at peak to raise my income to the level of atleast $80,000.00 in the next year or so….matter of fact—at my age—who would want my abilities at this late stage of the game?    

My parents owned a house in Springfield Gardens Queens and were  able to put a pool in the back yard and still had room–plenty of room to spare. 

 My mother had an Irish female friend and they went into business together.  They used to drive to Brooklyn and buy antiques!!!  I told you—my father did well for a black man back in the 60’s and 70’s.

My father paid off the house before he died!   There were many issues with the house that I will discuss later.

 The actual point I am making is about my lack of financial Security—and wealth. 

Since my husband got sick,  he has been missing for 10 years total! 

I have to  feed, honour, and protect my son and my mon—So how does one do it? 

I cannot jump from one job to the next….It is better to hold on and pray at this time for me. 

Do I have an IQ problem?  Is that is what is holding me back from wealth like that of my white female friend who is married to a wealthy white man? 

Actually then  maybe she just married smart!   But there are not that many wealthy black men to chose from. 

They usually marry the white or non-black females—You know the Trophy Wives!!! Just like Kim Kardasshian! Talked about today in Black Voices AOL.   I can say this because I had a White female  friend who had  stated that she was her husband’s trophy   during  the time that my husband got sick and she was having to cope with a marriage that she wanted to get out of. 

 My friends problem that she already had two children by her husband.  But she could not take his “mood” swings.  She loved her husband dearly and she loved her too, but he was prone to outbursts of severe anger.

  She also did not get along with his family.  They were living in an apartment in his parents house and she did not like the conditions of the apartment. 

 I was not in that condition.  I loved my husband and I tried to cope with my inlaws.  But my husband got sick nonetheless, and his family blamed me for this entire situation. —What a mess!

  So,  maybe it is an IQ thing. 

 I will follow up later with my desparity with my White Cohort Baby Boomers and their financial stability in opposition to my financial instability.  

The following web sites  are the actual articles to which I am making reference on the ‘BELL CURVE DISCUSSION’:

http://www.boston.com/businessglobe/articles/2007/11/13black_white_income_gap_grew_since_70s_2007-grew since the 2007

http://news-service.standford.edu/pr/94/941109Arc4057.html