Riveroflifelisajoy’s Weblog
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Guess What? Weight is a Direct connection to Illness….Heard that on 1010 Wins Health minute! So where’s the Comedy in that?
There are those heavy, full figured comedians which shall remain namelss, (Monique) who state that BIG IS BEAUTIFUL! Well I think that is the problem.
Making one’s soda extra large at the fast food place, or having BIGGIE FRIES or double, double whopper is not HEALTHY!
So why are the comedians who can afford a : weight trainer, lap ban surgery, and live in doctor telling us big gals and big men that it is alright to STAY BIG?
That is not a good road to lead people down. No, no one is leading me into Biggie fries…I chose those on my own…(if and when I make a choice in that direction!)
But still, self-esteem is a big issue in today. I had a friend who is a rather small man in height and weight….OH, there are men who love women your size. Wait, I will get the name of the “CLUB” that you can go to inorder to meet men who LOVE BIG WOMEN!!!! UGHHHHHH!!!
If there was a moment in my life when I knew that I could see the end of a friendship in big clear letters it was then! I was not into any kind of weird fetish club! Some people like to look at women’s hands etc…..I do not want to be put in that category.
Yes I am big….but no I do not want someone who is looking for a WOMAN MY SIZE! How dare you! I am not a car, mini van, coup deville, or corvet that you pick out at the showroom.
Picture this, “Oh, yes we have the model you are looking for, Large Brown Woman, Gap in front of teeth, teeth more yellow than white, This is our used model category of woman though, but very, very, very reliable!
Great mileage….hardly used at all, only bore one child. But alas, this is a late model you know….a baby boomer. But she does put in a hard days work, despite the now recent weigh in of 269.1pounds!
Her legs are strong. She has actual ankles, not cankles, you know the calve, and ankles combo….she has distinct ankles for her age and weight.
She takes her water pills and blood pressure pills quite faithfully. Yes she is our SEDAN VERSION OF A LARGE WOMAN….A LITTLE BIT LUXURY, AND A LITTLE BIT ECONOMY….YOU KNOW–SHE IS THE HARD WORKING TYPE…NOT THE PINK FEATHER TOE, BON BON EATING TYPE….SO HERE SHE IS!”
See how degrading that all seems? It is silly, but that is how annoyed my small framed, low weight male friend felt when he made that comment to me.
And I told him about it….that is right! If I was a beautiful woman with long flowing black curly hair, I would not want anyone to tell me to go to a club where woman that look like me would find a match of a man who likes woman with black curly hair!
Everyone wants to be loved for the unique qualities that are within their spirit and their heart. No one wants to be picked out for their strange shaped forehead or something.
I am not a cow, a cat or a car. Treat me special please! ooooh, I digress! I am sorry, I kind of went off on a tangent didn’t I? Okay, where were we, Oh, yes.
Being overweight might appeal to some, but where are it’s health benefits if any? I heard it today, on 2/15/08….on my favorite radio news station 1010 wins—that there is a direct correlation to health and cancer based on weight according to a study done.
(The WHO that did the study has slipped my mind at this time—but it does not matter, I have heard that statement from my doctor many, many, many times!)
My problem today, to correlate to that “new so-called statistical data finding…my back has been aching for the past month now. It hurts just above the kidney aread…or at it directly.
One morning on a Monday to be exact, I woke up and was too dizzy and weak to make it to work. I called out sick and made my doctor appointment which I had been putting off.
When I told the doctor about this constant pain after I eat meals, drink, or have to move around too much, she took blood. Since I have highblood pressure and my child Daniel has been getting sick lately I chalked it up to stress.
But to be on the safe side…lets not ignore ole’ Betsy the Sedan Large and Lovely Body Beautiful….shall we? So blood tests all done, and now MamoGrahm, and GYN up next too.
We must check out the facts about weight and health correlation! I do not want to be the guinea Hippo here…but this is really for myself, and my family.
I am merely sharing this oh, so very private health condition, and issues with you to help you women who are in my mid-forties, and 269.1 category….not to direct to you a CLUB for large babes….but to direct you to a better state of mind in regards to your daily health!
Remember…..our families need us to live long enough to see them grow, and mature, and be there for babies and all like that.
So, do me and you a favor,….no I do not know where the club for Big Gals and the men who love them are….I would not allow my male friend tell me where to go….because I am mentally a Big Gal with a Medium, healthy weight woman rising!
(could not resist the horoscope correlation…ladies!) So seriously, take the time to check out your aches and pains. I personally believe in natural weight loss. I am afraid of that lap band surgery.
There are two women that are on my job right now that have lost tremendous weight, from the surgery. But see, I cannot be happy not eating! I am a foodie!
No, I do not binge, I just like a good cooked meal. I have bad habits for eating dinner late into the night and then going immediately to bed. I have to get up early, around 5 am. I always feel sick.
Sometimes I will throw up while brushing my teeth, because the food from the late night dinner after I worked overtime at my job, did not digest properly. You know that when you lay down to sleep your digestive track has the nerve to stop working right?
So production stops and all that food becomes are hard nasty lump in the pit of your stomach and when you awake you feel nauseaous! Ugh!
So getting back to our, yours and my health.
Check out those aches and pains and call Jenny Craig, WeightWatchers and First CALL YOUR DOCTOR AND MAKE AN APPOINTMENT…..TAKE A FRIEND WITH YOU IF YOU ARE SCARED…..BUT GO, BIG GALS GO! —All joking aside….look in the mirror, you are beautiful, but your heart will love you more if you take good care of it!
And one more thing Ladies….In honor of Women’s heart month…..and Valentines Day—Take care of your heart and it will take care of you! Happy Valentines Day!
Take care, until next weight and health blog—
riveroflifelisajoy!!!
Dangerous! Dangerous! Plastic Surgery…the tragic Loss of Kanye West’s Mom, Donda
Elective surgery is just that, ELECTIVE.
Plastic surgery needs to be called or renamed something else. Stop making “light” of invasive techniques that augment a person’s appearance.
When I was a kid I thought that “plastic surgery” was not “real” surgery. I thought that a person went into a operating room and came out beautiful—with out pain and glowing!
I thought that women came out in a yesteryear “Greek” goddess dress ( toga) and men came out in a white toga too!
Suddenly they would look years younger and the bags under their eyes, the dark circles would be gone.
I thought it was a simple process! Then that show called EXTREME MAKEOVERS came on TV and forever changed my view of “plastic surgery forever!
If you noticed, they never took candidates for plastic surgery if they were obese! You had to be in good basic health.
If you were slightly heavy they would not take you. They would make you shake off those extra pounds with an extreme make over exercise person before the surgery! Then the pain of the surgery, and recovery room and hospital stay would be shown.
But they never allowed someone to go home or to the hotel room immediately afterward!
That is what happened to dear Kanye’s Mom D0nda! Look, the doctor does not have to live or love his patient—but he is supposed to look out for that patient’s health.
The medical oath that all doctors take states,”First…DO NO HARM!” I read the blurb on this Doctor, who just happened to be in California, had a television show, was black, and good looking.
That should be a great thing! But instead it spelled out a very deadly perscription in this case. I cried today looking at the picture of Kanye and his Mom.
I could see the love between Mother and Child—not Kanye West (the rapper) but instead I saw the look on his face in the AOL Black Voices blog on the last pictures that were taken for Essence Magazine.
I saw the pictures of Kanye when he was a baby and his Mom was holding him in her arms and talking to him….So sweet, so gentle was her picture with her new baby. I heart hurts to think of this tragic unnessesary loss!
She was only 58 years young! She was a symbol of success for the young black, white, brown young men and young women today. She had been a college professor in California and she also had been a Fulbright Scholar!!!
This woman was an icon for me! So what went wrong? Mistakes do happen. Not the doctor—he did not make a mistake—the doctor, after the autopsy results come in will have a different out c0me. The mistake that was made might have been through trusting him to know what he was doing.
The mistake was believing that he had his patient’s best interest at heart. But really, how would the patient know? This is difficult to answer. No one knows what was stated between the doctor and his patient. No one knows the promises that had been made.
But I will describe a situation that I went through and maybe that might help to ease some of the pain…..but for me the pain is there. Although I did not know Donda West, I feel like she was a “sister in my head”–she was everything I am striving to be—well educated, my son successful at whatever he wants to be in life, and she herself making a difference in life by being an educator!
Such a tragic waste of such a beautiful woman!
A couple of years ago, I had a lump or nodule, a tumor inside my left cheek. I do not know when it got there….but it was there.
It would not bother me most of the time. Since it was inside my mouth it would sit on top of my bottom left molar. It did not bother me until I had something to eat.
Then I had to keep adjusting it so I could chew my food. God forebid I eat a piece of meat….sometimes I would bite that stupid lump so hard by mistake I would see stars!!!!
So of course to make a long story short I had a referral from my doctor to see a surgeon. A ‘HEAD AND NECK’ surgeon to be exact. He was quite handsome to say the least!
He looked like the dark foreboding Dr. Killdare if any of you are old enough to remember that black and white television show a about the ever so serious Dr. Killdare.
Well anyway after I got over my doctors good looks, I began to dislike him tremedously!!!
I was afraid of the surgery for the most part. I thought he was not telling me everything.
I thought that I had oral cancer and he was trying to keep me calm by not discussing it in detail. He gave me a date of the surgery. He told me I would not be hospitalized, and said that I would not be given general sedation.
I was unhappy after he said that. Why you ask? I am a BIG, BIG, BIG BABY ! that is why! What do you mean no sedation?!!!!
I have to have it! I can not take knowing that you are digging around in my mouth and I am awake to see, hear, smell, taste blood and all that!
What if that lump has a big root and you have to yank on it or somthing?!!! I was too through with my handsome Dr. Killdare—he was mean, evil uggggggh!!!!!
I think he thought I was a bit nutty but I did not care! I called up and spoke to the medical center where the surgery was to be preformed. I spoke to the head surgeon.
He calmed me down. He asked me some questions about my general health and I told him. He said that he would make sure that I was comfortable and not to worry.
Because worry would not be good for your surgery. Try to take it easy. Well, a friend of mine who is a police officer accompanied me with my son and he waited outside. I was dressed in my hospital gown and given my little green surgery hat.
Uggggh!!! The butterflies began to grow in my stomach and crawl up my throat into my neck. I started to shiver a bit inside my gut, after I laid in the bed and looked around.
I saw a young teenager. I saw an older woman, and other surgery patients recoperating. The room was very large.
A nurse approached me and asked me two times, “What is your name? How old are you? Please come and get on the scale.” Then the jokes started.
“What are you having today? Oh, you have a little nodule in your mouth….you must have been telling lies to get that!!! Aha, aha!!! chuckle, chuckle!
I tried to smile, but no matter what that nurse said to make me laugh I could not stop thinking about what was coming next.
All I could think of was some type of WOODY ALLEN scene with me jumping off of the table and being held down by the doctor and the nurses while they attempted to yank this stupid lump out of my left cheek.
I also pictured being disfigured because the lump was about an inch long. Oh, Lord, have mercy, help me Lord. I said the psalm 23, and asked G0d to give me the strength.
As I was laying there another person approached and asked me my name two times( to make sure I guess) and then he started to talk about sedation.
I told him that I need to sleep. I do not want to know what is going on in this surgery. He said that it is dangerous to go to sleep. He will make sure that I do not feel anything but it is dangerous to go to sleep.
He also asked me two times about my general health. Figure the math, I am overweight etc. so that was definitely not a good sign for the gentleman with the sedation.
He walked away. Then here came Dr. Killdare—(as handsome and mean as ever!) “Oh-come on!! he said, beginning to get annoyed with my childish behavior you do not need general sedation!!! It is a little thing in there!!!! Just let me give you a local and you will be fine. You know how it is?! Just like when you go to the dentist!”
Look, I said, I do not handle dental appointments very well. I had been through something as a kid and I cannot take a needle to be put in my mouth without something to calm me. I am afraid I may jump up and cause myself more problems.
Please, Please I begged Dr. Killdare—-I need sedation inorder to cope with this! So he did authize a mild sedation. The gentleman that gave it to me, told me to count backwards and then all I remember was waking up a little and I heard the doctor tell me to open my mouth more.
I heard him tell the nurse to “take that for biopsy.” I closed my eyes again and then I was told to wake up and move very slowly to the next gurney.
I was wheeled back to my recovery location. I was really feeling weak, tired, and dizzy. But that surgery was over and my mouth had a slight swelling on the inside…but no more stupid LUMP!
Praise the Lord! When I opened my eyes I saw a woman across from me. I don’t know what she had but she was moaning and her face looked terrrible.
I think she had a face lift or something. This was not a hospital. This place was only for same day, same day home surgery! There were packs of blood around her and clear tubes with it moving slowly through them.
I could not tell if it was being given to her or it was being taken away from her. It all looked to complicated and messy.
Then I understood why Dr. Killdare was so annoyed with me. I am a big silly baby!!!! My fearless Dr. Killdare came to my side and said, “How are you feeling?’
I felt quite stupid—so I smiled and sheepishly said,”Fine” through the gauze in my mouth. He said that I had to stay another hour or so.
I was not to drive for atleast one week. He gave me an appointment to come in and see him for a follow up and to get the test results from the lab.
I received instructions on how to eat. and then he teased me and said….Wait until it heals….you won’t even know that there ever was anything there!”
I liked Dr. Killdare again. I survived.
But, I also was being a bad patient at one point because he was trying to make sure that I did not have any complications with sedation. They have given me a mild one and I did alright. Thank God.
Sometimes life can be complicated, and tragic. I hope all of us start to listen to the no-s from our doctors, and the yeses too. Always get a second opinion and even a third if you are still not happy.
Check out your Doctors credentials too. Becareful out there. Surgery is not anyting to play with! Especially Elective, PLASTIC SURGERY!!!!
Please handle your health conditions with care and careful consideration before walking into the pre-op room.
Know what you are getting yourself into. And take every percaution possible.
Listen to your doctor —it will save your life!
Remember, love yourself, love your family—take care of yourselves!
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