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HOW TO HELP YOUR CHILD BECOME A SUCCESS!
Some people like to tell me to stop focusing on my kid so much. But you know what? If I do not help him now…he may not be able to support himself or his future wife and kids. So what is wrong with being there now?
Oh, some people have told me…you need to keep yourself happy. Look, when I am past the age of 48 that I am now….I would hate to have to look back and see that I did not do all I could to help my child acheive.
Hey, everybody has a diferent reason for what they do in life.
I am sitting here blogging….so am I totally consumed with my son 24 hours a day????? OF COURSE NOT! My son plays tennis with other people. I do not actually play the game.
I am there to help him to stay focused on the actual training.
How do you think Tiger Woods and Venus and Serena made it to the top of their sports and careers?
The parents helped those kids stay focused and become the men and women that they are today.
Last week ( at the Kids Day in Queens of the USOPEN) Serena won $15,000.00 for a charity that she began her own name…to give back to the community.
So all of the effort that the father of Venus and Serena Williams (Tennis Champions) placed and focused on helping the two young ladies paid off and it now helps others!
—– So when my son gets up to play…I am about 200 to 300 feet away from him. I also am either shopping, or checking in on my mother…reading a newspaper, or talking to other parents.
My son has to come to his own conclusions about his goals and dreams.
I AM ONLY A FACILITATOR!!!!!
I drive my son to the golf course in Dyker Brooklyn to the children’s golf course. I take him to the SPORTS AUTHORITY look at tennis rackets, tennis clothing, golf clubs, etc. I take him to Barns and Nobles for books for school, and reading material. I drive him to competitions, and to coaching lessons. But the rest is up to him.
So is that wrong? Hey, look, my child did not ask to be born. My child was a WANTED CHILD!~ I was legally married to my husband for 5 years before I finally got pregnant.
I have not had any other pregnancies, or any other husbands. Soooo for me to sacrifice….is absolutely nothing. My child could not raise himself.
When you have a child you have to consider atleast….20 years or so to help him or her get educated, have food, shelter, training how to live in this life, and be able to get a job or career.
So for me it will not be the EMPTY NEST SYNDROME….it will be happiness that I gave as much as I could to help someone to accomplish his goals.
If he turns around and changes his mind about his goals, and throws it all away…he cannot blame me.—for I have given all of myself to him to become a man… of stature and respect.
If he turns his back on whatever ideals and concepts that have been carefully taught to him….I will bare no shame in this….it will be his choice as a man.
But if I turn away now…as he just enters his 10th grade in highschool and is finishing his 15th year of life…then I will be to blame.
My selfishness will begin later. So right now…I enjoy blogging! Is there anything wrong with that? I am on vacation…when I express my views here with you.
So that is why I challenge all of us parents…focus on HOW TO HELP YOUR CHILD BECOME A SUCCESS…YOU WILL NOT REGRET HONEST HARD WORK….AND PURE LOVE GIVEN TO YOUR CHILDREN.
Remember..even Vice President hopeful Elect Palin has 5 children and her oldest daughter who is 17 is pregnant according to the news reports on 1010 Wins and AOL NEWS MEDIA, she fully supports them in all that they do. She supports her 17 year old daughter in her goals for herself and soon to be new family.
The most important thing is keeping an OPEN COMMUNICATION WITH YOUR CHILDREN. NO MATTER WHAT!
That will mean your children should come to you with whatever the condition is.
It is not easy to do that. I know. I am a single parent.
I want the best for my son…but I also know that no one’s kid is an angel. So pray with your kids, and love them…just as the Lord above loves you and forgives you of all your mistakes daily….correct?
Remember no one is perfect, and everyone makes mistakes.
Love your kids….love yourself and don’t be too hard on your kids or yourself.
You and your family will live happier, and longer lives. TOGETHER!!!
till next blog….
RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY!~
MORE FROM ***46 HEALTHY SOUL FOOD RECEIPES****Power to End Stroke*** You are the Power***Stroke Association.org ~~~~~((SOUP)) CHICKEN SOUP WITH MUSTARD GREENS AND TOMATOES!!! WOW!
This is another installment to inform and assist all humanbeings. As I stated before I went to a job related function and I received this lovely little book on receipes for people of color. This information was given to me by a nice lady that represented the American Heart Association. She wanted all of us to get out the word about black Americans and stroke.—-So please understand I am copying from the booklet…the information you are about to read is from the booklet called 46 HEALTHY SOUL FOOD RECIPES—
EDITOR Sandra K. Nissenberg,
CEO Louis Weber,
President Magazine Division Jerry L. Croft,
Editor-in- Chief James M. O’Connor.
BEST RECEIPES TM SPECIAL
VOL.1, no. 23, June 12, 2007
2007 Publications International, LTD.
Favorite Brand Name Recipes at www.fbnr.com
For Publications International, LTD. business inquiries call 847-329-5841
AMERICAN HEART ASSOCIATION. ORG—-
REMEMBER: according to 46 HEALTHY SOUL FOOD RECEIPES AND AMERICAN HEART ASSOCIATION……
STROKE TARGETS BY COLOR.
KNOW WHERE YOU STAND. The odds are African Americans are twice as likely to suffer a stroke as white Americans.
Beating the odds isn’t about winning. It’s about living. You have the power to end stroke. 1-888-4-stroke/ StrokeAssociation.org.
Now to the receipe of the day!
Chicken Soup with Mustard Greens and Tomatoes!
Serves 4…1 cup per serving
4 cups fat-free, low sodium chicken broth
1 small carrot, thinkly sliced
4 large mustard green leaves, coarsely chopped (about 4 cups)
2 medium italian plum tomatoes, diced
2 ounces diced lower-sodium, low-fat ham (about 1/4 cup)
2 medium green onions, thinly sliced
1 tablespoon imitation bacon bits
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
Now, according to the receipe follow the next set of directons….
In a large saucepan, bring the broth and carrot to a simmer over medium-high heat. Reduce the heat and simmer, covered, for 5 minutes, or until the carrot is almost tender.
Stire in the remaining ingredients. Increase the heat to medium high and return to a simmer. reduce the heat and simmer, covered, for 10 minutes, or until the greens are tender and the flavors blend.
Ladle into soup bowls.
Per serving: calories 61, Total fat 1.0g. Saturated fat 0.0g, Polyunstaturated fat 0.0g, Monounsaturated fat 0.5g, Cholesterol 6 mg, Sodium 297 mg. Carbohydrates 7g, Dietary Fiber 3 g, Sugars 3 g, Protein 7 g.
Dietary Exchanges: 1 1/2 Vegetable, 1/2 Very Lean Meat
So there you have it…page # 10 in the Soups chapter of the 46 HEALTHY SOUL FOOD RECEIPES!!!!
NOW GET TO COOKIN!
TILL NEXT BLOG~~~~
RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY
MINISTER JUANITA BYNUM AND SHOCK JOCK WENDY WILLIAMS OF WBLS 107.5–WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE TWO WHEN IT COMES TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?

Before I proceed allow me to explain. It is important to understand this one major point. NO WOMAN SHOULD BE ABUSED FOR ANY REASON AT ALL! NO HUMANBEING SHOULD BE ABUSED FOR ANY REASON AT ALL!
Now, I will proceed. I looked at the blogs and news paper articles on Minister Juanita Bynum and her marriage abuse/domestic violence episode that is ripping her marriage and ministry.
Then I looked at Wendy Williams of the Wendy Williams Experience, and her EEO case with Nicole Spence involving her husband Kevin Hunter and –the domestic violence episodes that are threatening her very lucrative career.
I began to wonder. Wendy has a following of faithful listeners, and Juanita Bynum has a following of faithful listeners TOO!
Strange huh?! Except Wendy does not preach the Gospel.
Wendy has a daily four hour show that goes from 2:00 P.M. until 7:00 P.M. . Juanita Bynum has a church, has CDs, DVD’s for sale, she tours the country and many, many other options for reaching her flock of faithful followers!
The obvious similarity is that they are both HIGH POWERED TYPE- A- PERSONALITY BLACK WOMEN!
Who can rival them?—–THEIR HUSBANDS!
Both Wendy Williams and Juanita Bynum are both powerful black women that stand tall and stong in their own work and careers.
Yet they are challenged by the problems of domestic violence in their home ((((which is being displayed publicly))) despite their efforts to keep private pain private.
Why are their husband’s possibly challenging these two strong women in their careers?
Why would the husbands of these two very opposite…yet equally powerful and influential women– allow their private marital behavior jeopardize their very successful wives in the year 2007 and 2008?
Let us think for a moment….As African Decent women, Wendy Williams and Juanita Bynum have come a long way and have taken the lead within the black community in the United States, and possibly even in the world and the “global economy!” **Not to mention Ophra of course***
Wendy Williams was broadcasting from California today! She attracts all walks of life, despite her sporadic rants about ”white people” and her blackness.
She recently complained about how her son’s Montclair New Jersey school district have suggested that the children wear ”green” for St. Patricks Day. But when she had inquired as to what the children could wear for “Black History Month,” or “Martin Luther King Day”….she was flatly told that there was nothing that the children could wear for such annual events in American Society.
So Wendy did not say that she would not have her son wear green….or wait a minute …my mind is not clear if she was against him actually wearing the green but I remember Wendy Williams stating “I have a plan for that day.” This is a strong woman.
She maintains her “HOW YOU DON’IN” AND ”Hee Haw” for the “Donkey People (folks who do not know how to avoid being used and abused, and coming back for more…or the people who ”steal” other people’s mates etc., etc.,) But as she states….”At the end of the day …I am a mother and a wife!”
That is why this whole circumstance of the domestic violence and the Nicole Spence EEO issue has floored me.
That is why I looked at Juanita Bynum, whose “No More Sheets” sermon stirred so many Christian and Non-Christian Believers to stop taking less in life; stop taking less in their personal relationships; and take back from the devil what he stole from them….their pride, their self esteem, their will to live, their joy…..etc., etc..
Believe it or not….Wendy Williams and Juanita Bynum have alot in common….They just reach people in a different way. Juanita Bynum preaches and uses scripture and Wendy Williams uses a SideKick Charlemene. Wendy Williams also uses her various interactive draws called Dons and Divas Dances, and even children in events for Easter (last year 2007).
I did not hear anything about a children Dons and Divas Kiddie affair for 2008—I might have missed it. Sound Effects, Ghetto Street Talk, Alternative Life style talk and various genres of communication to preach her message of intelligence.
Wendy always tries to tell those who feel like misfits in the current society that they will be accepted on her show.
Now, unfortuneately I have seen, and heard about the Christian Church…not so nice things on the level of accepting the”misfits of society” based on religious reasons….(((despite Jesus reprimand of men who wanted to stone the harlot woman for her sins….
Jesus said, “He without sin cast the first stone….and No one cast the stone….they all walked away ashamed.” Jesus truly turned to the harlot woman and told her to “Go and sin no more, your sins are forgiven!” Sometimes this verse is very seldom discussed or preached….I wonder why?
Well, any way….I will continue this further later on.
But just think about it for a minute….The two women I am comparing and contrasting here are both black, high powered…..and very, very, very famous in the black community for different reasons…yet they both suffer from domestic violence.
But my question still remains….Is it the effects of the power and the fame on the marriage that causes the stress and the strain?
Did these two women, or other women permit themselves to stay in bad marriages, or abusive relationships in order to maintain that appearance of SUCCESS to the OUTSIDE WORLD AT LARGE?
To many Christians, it does not seem proper to have a broken marriage after telling people how “Jesus can set the sinner free from bondage to death, hell and the grave.”
It looks odd that Jesus is seemingly unable to prevent two Christians from breaking up, or fighting with each other over serious or silly issues.
Personality conflicts, irreconsilible differences that legal documents site for marriage break ups…seem strange in the Christain faith…because we are suppose to look beyond our differences and look at what fits the marriage like glue….JESUS!
So that is possibly why the Powerful Juanita Bynum and her abusive marriage/domestic violent episode is rocking the Christian Church and is so very painful and humiliating to watch, and hear about in the media.
We want Jesus to fix it. But see, it has to be fixed within the two people….they have to both be willing….they have to release the issues that have bound them and then open themselves to healing.
How difficult is that for such a Powerful Preacher Juanita Bynum and her Powerful preacher husband?
With Wendy Williams, the struggle is severe but also it takes a different turn. Wendy’s job as a Radio Shock Jock Journalist, is one in which she constantly opens the private lives of well known celebrities to public view through discussion, or interview.
Now, listen, Wendy always states….”I did not do the actual research….I only repeated what I read National Enquirer or “Life and Style” Magazine. So you can’t say I had an insider tell me and I let the cat out of the bag.”—Wendy Williams…(paraphrase only)
No, but she does discuss celebrity gossip as a major part of her show ~~~~just like I am writing about and comparing and contrasting her and Juanita Bynum.
If you do not pass gossip along…then you are not a gossiper….but if you join in on the chain of lies…or truths…or whatever they be….you then cannot say that you are not part of the problem….can you?
Example, Britney Spears personal struggles have been so hightlighted by the media that every body knows that Britney Spears may go out on the town with out underwear on ….to night clubs etc. How do we all know about that?
Because the media gossip columnist and Rag Mags, and Shock Jocks on the radio, and even the regular news channels are constantly showing pictures, or describing Britney Spears even doing mundane activities like shopping with a friend.
Thus Wendy Williams is being trashed by her rivals for being a gossip shock jock and now she is embroiled in her own personal dilemmas.
So her rivals on Hot 97 are jumping up and down at her troubles and Wendy is catching the Heat!
Wendy is catching the heat like no one else…except Janet Jackson did after her “wardrobe malfunction” during that football game a couple of years ago. Perfect lovable Janet Jackson made a big mistake and it took several years to live it down.
The public is not very forgiving of its’ “American Idols”–so it seems. Thus the troubles of Wendy Williams—high powered black woman in a high stakes position in the radio and television media/journalism industry….So again I ask…
.Why would her also “black” husband not realize the opportunity they both have to pave the road for young minorities of all races….are the issues in the marriage that severe or that trivial?
It is like being at the top of a mountain….Let’s say Mount Everest….a very tall mountain upon which you can see the future….and yet you worry about a splinter in your finger!
To remedy that splinter is easy….but that distance you wish to travel will be a long, long road filled with bumps, valleys, dark places, and bogs….so move forward and not look back.
It is sad to see our hopefuls that give our youth vision….for the Old Testament states….”Without a Vision the People Perish!”
So that is why I focused on these two women and the men they are married to. Do they not realize that their lives have impacted on so many generations to come? Probably not.
The problem I have with domestic violence is that it appears that the man (any man) who either rapes a woman, or beats a woman….uses those extreme methods to have POWER over a situation inwhich the man feels powerless. This is a difficult issue to say the least.
What do you think?
Riveroflifelisajoy



MIDDLE PASSAGE AND THE MEMORIES OF A SLAVE~~~Fiction by Riveroflifelisajoy
May 24, 2008 at 2:10 pm · Filed under ABOLITION OF SLAVERY WAS DONE TWO CENTURIES AGO...WHY D, Al Sharpton on Human Rights, American History, BLACK WOMEN DESTROYED DURING THE MIDDLE PASSAGE DURING, BRUTALITY OF SLAVERY AND MIDDLE PASSAGE, Barak Obama for President, Black Army Reservists, Black Children, Black Family, Black History, Black Male Children and Poverty, Blacks in Sports, Business and Human Rights Ethics, CHARLES DARWIN THEORY OF EVOLUTION AND THE ENDANGERED P, CLINTON ON JOBS, Coping with Death, Coping with Emotional Pain of Tradegy, Coping with Loss, Culture lost and regained through slavery, Decline of African/Black American marriages, FICTION WRITING ABOUT SLAVERY, FREE WRITE, Faith, Family in Crisis, Fear of the unknown, HILLARY CLINTON AND BARAK OBAMA, Have Faith in Spite of the Circumstances, Health, Hillary Clinton for President, Human Rights Issues, Lincoln and Douglas Debates, Negro Doll Makers, Negro Men In Medicine, Obama and his personal struggle, Obama on RAISE THE MINIMUM WAGE FOR ALL AMERICANS--spee, PAT BUCHANAN RACIST REMARKS ON SLAVERY IN AMERICA AND I, PAT BUCHANNON AND HIS VIEWS THAT BLACKS SHOULD BE THANK, Poverty in America, Racism, Religion and Trust in God, Religion and our Faith, Rev. Wright and his Racist Comments, SELF REFLECTION, SLAVERY AND THE BLACK AMERICAN MARRIAGE IN TODAY'S SOCI, SLAVERY AND THE WEST INDIES AND ABROAD, Save the Children, Selfesteem, Selfishness, Short stories by Amatuers, THE KENNEDY FAMILY BACKS OBAMA, THE VOYAGE FROM MOTHERLAND AFRICA TO THE NEW LAND AMER, The wipping post and slavery, Thoughtless words, Trusting God for All things, Views from Within, Writing, black male teens, children and mothers's in slavery, fear of being alone, fear of death and dying, plantations and broken black families, single parenting, slavery and broken black men, slavery and destroyed families, slavery and separated families and tagged: children and mothers in slavery, Culture lost and regained through slavery, Mini Short, plantations and broken black families, Short stories by Amatuers, slavery and broken black men, slavery and destroyed families, slavery and separated families, The wipping post and slavery
Ma name is John Smith.
Ah, been in dis here plantation since a
was a young chile..sold offin’
my Mama befo’ I was ten.
But Ah memba’ my Mama face
and my Mama hands.
My Mama face wuz brown
tired and sad.
She wore a ole’ faded
red head rag. She would
take me wid her to clean
the chicken coups
and feed the cows.
Ah would play and chase
the chickens!
One day the master
of da house came and
picked me out from
ma friends and told
my Mama it wuz time
fo’ me to go!
I wuz too big to
be playin’ anymo’.
The master sent ole’
Joe, the helper to carry me off
to the market to be
sold.
Ah cried and kicked and
screamed fo’ my
Mama.
She just stood a lookin’
after me and did not
move to help me!
Ah watched my Mama
grow tiny as the horse,
cart pulled me and the otha’ slaves who
was packed into it away from
my birth plantation to a
new and dangerous beginin’!
Ah wuz sold to the Williams.
Mr. Williams was kind, but
his son was the mean one.
He liked to beat slaves fo’ nuthin’
and then leave um to die if they
put up a fuss.
He would jus’ buy mo’
slaves the next day.
The Williams plantation
was a cotton plantation.
Hard work, pickin’ cotton,
cuts up yo’ hands and stuff.
Ah grew big and strong.
I could carry three times my weight
on a good day.
So young master Williams took
good care uh me.
But ah hated ta see
my friends suffer so.
One day we heard of the
UNDERGROUND RAILROAD.
Ah decided to run awa’.
No, Ah told ye, that Master Williams
wuz good to me. Ah just wanted to see
my Mama so bad.
Ah did not care about good treatment.
Ah wanted to be free!
Ah made a chance run fo’ it
one night.
Ah wuz tryin’ ta meet
up wid the UnderGround RailRoad
in the forest.
Ah, made a mistake.
I told ole’ Buck, who curries the
Master’s horses. He warn’ me
not to try it! Ah, told him to minds his business!
I could out run any dog, or horse….cause the master
fed me the best food cause ah carried the heavy loads and pulled
plows when the horses went lame.
Sos’ I think that is why I wuz caught so fast.
When they draggs’ me back to the
plantation, there was ole’ Buck a lookin’
at me. From a distance he kept gettin’
bigger, and bigger. He stood right at
the wipping post and look at me….just starin’
and shaking his ole’ grey head.
When they tied me up I could see dried
blood where other slaves had been beat.
It wuz a cloudy day.
It wuz a hot night.
They found me in the day and wup me
deep into da night.
Young Master Williams took a break
from his workin’ my back, and
then told his workers to continue on
till the next mornin’ just wupin’
my back.
I stop yellin’ and then I don’t
member nothin after dat.
All I know is that I found ma’self
sittin up here wit Jesus, and da
Angels.
Oh, and I found Mama too!
Except she got a big smile on
huh face, and she wearing a white
dress and she don’t look tired no’ mo’.
Fini~~~
Fiction Depiction of Slavery
by Riveroflifelisajoy
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