Riveroflifelisajoy’s Weblog
Just another WordPress.com weblogThanks to the Legend of Bagger Vance….My son played with “POOL PUTTING GAME” from Marshalls!
We saw the movie “Legend of Bagger Vance.” I had purchased a “pool” putter game about a month ago for my son. But he did not touch it.
I tried to play it the other day…but I was ill. But atleast I tried. But after he saw the movie, he changed. Will Smith has a uncanny soft voice that paired with the beautiful cinematography…cast a lovely spell on me, my mother and my son.
The end of the movie moved me to tears…to believe for the impossible and hope to see those lost redeemed.
Excellent movie indeed! Thanks Will Smith, it made my day. Especially when my son went into the back yard early in the morning on Saturday and began teaching himself how to get the golf ball into the 6 putter plates for an hour.
He had hit the ball too much and the ball would jump OVER the putter plates. Then he began to sense the “field” and the flow of the earth and feel his own heart beat in time and then he got his swing!!!!
He actually began to hit the ball into the putter plate with the proper angle, speed, and force.
The ball actually stayed inside and did not jump up and out like before. I remembered Will Smith (as Bagger Vance) talking gently to Matt Damon as Juna..explaining how to find himself in the “field.” It was wonderful…beautiful, and made me feel like I had been wanting to speak to my son about his goals and dreams for his life.
So I remembering the way Will’s voice soothingly, yet firmly directed him toward his winning shots in the game.
So either my son ignored me, or he felt that he could relate to that movie. Wonderful, thanks Will Smith for your great acting style.
And thanks Robert Redford for picking a movie to highlight the beauty of golf and the quiet spirit of each of its’ players!
post script….I only paid $5.00 dollars for the “pool putter game”—golf balls and all.–It was originally $16.00! WOW!
Till Next Blog….
FOREOROROROROROROROROE!!!!!!
riveroflifelisajoy`~~
My walk and work in Love
My walk day to day is hard
on dry ground I trodd
Some rocks and pebbles–
some gullys and ravens
My walk day to day is hard
Above my head a Falcon flies
a bird of prey, seeking his
meal of the day
I crawl on forward
down this lonely trail
My heart feels light
despite the burden that
I bear….
Oh, my walk day to day is hard
I do wonder for what reason
I was dealt this card
My heart bears a burden
no one knows about…except
for you God, my father
I wonder for what reason I was
chosen to go without human
companionship…like my aunt
Ellen….a devote 7th day adventist…
Oh, yes my walk day to day is hard!
Even if I found a man that I love
he is already spoken for.
So the Lord tells me to be hunble
and crawl away, and leave that
man alone…because he could never
be mine.
I want to love and be loved but ….
it appears that my walk and work in love
is to be as Paul….be still ….be quiet…..and walk humbly…
serve the Lord in mercy, and solitude and be alone
for the rest of my life….
Oh, yes, my walk and work is truly in Love…
Agape` Love….
So teach me Lord to wish the best for others.
Teach me Lord to pray for others happiness
Have mercy Lord on me for complaining
For yes, I am a hand maid of the Lord
and my reward is to do the will of you
My Soveign King…..to bring light into
darkness, joy into sadness…for other human
beings ….not for myself.
Help me Lord to resist the temptations
that come against me….give me strength dear Lord
to gather myself and march forward as your servant
For yes my walk is hard, and rocky….
My soul salvation is you Lord..is you.
NEW YORK JUNIOR TENNIS LEAGUE…THE BEST FREE PROGRAM IN THE 5 BOROUGHS!!!!
HEY! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?????!!!! YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE
TENNIS LESSONS ARE RIGHT?
WELL….COME ABOARD THE NEW YORK JUNIOR TENNIS LEAGUE TRAIN…
AND GET YOUR CHILD WONDERFUL AND INSPIRED LESSONS FROM THE
BEST COACHES…WHOSE HEARTS ARE IN THE RIGHT PLACE!
Ask YORK CHU, and Wally! Two of the Coaches and leaders of the New York Junior Tennis League’s best programs!
On Saturday and Sunday morning…you will find Wally up and out on the
Har Tru tennis courts at the Billie Jean King Tennis Center at 6 AM TO 8 AM!!!
Wally the head coach, and spiritional Director of the Weekend Warrior
Tennis Program of the New York Tennis League…stresses that the New York Junior Tennis League program, is FREE, FREE, FREE, FREE!!!!!!
DID YOU HEAR …(UM, AH, READ….WHAT I SAID???? THE NEW YORK JUNIOR TENNIS LEAGUE…EARLY MORNING PROGRAM IS FREE FOR CHILDREN 5 YEARS OLD TO 18 YEARS OLD!!!!
Tennis helps children of all ages to achieve their personal best.
The New York Junior Tennis League is adding more to each individual student by giving the tennis lessons with qualified tennis professional coaches for free!…free! FREE!
HOW DID THE PROGRAM GET IT’S START??!!! Arthur Ashe helped to found and promote the program to help minority and disadvantage children be exposed to the wonderful game of tennis.
The New York Tennis League has been a great opportunity for my son who is 15 years old. He wants to pursue college and get a possible scholarship with the help of his tennis skills….So…the New York Junior Tennis League is helping him to strengthen his ability and mentoring him toward his educational goals as well.
Come out to the New York Junior Tennis League…or go online to the web site…..look up NYJTL.COM….OR JUST GOOGLE IT….
come out on Saturday and Sunday! You will be glad you woke up early…
you really will
HOW CREDIT SCORES HARMED A FAMILY IN QUEENS NEW YORK
I AM BACK AGAIN….NO I WILL NOT STOP TALKING OR WRITING ABOUT THE DESTRUCTIVE METHODS BEING USED BY THE FRESHMEADOWS, WINDSOR PARK, LEFRAK APARTMENTS AND HILLSIDE APARTMENT BUILDINGS IN QUEENS NEW Y ORK.
I AM A VICTIM, MY SON IS A VICTIM, MY X-HUSBAND (ACTUALLY MISSING ESTRANGED…DUE TO SKIZOPHRENIA FOR OVER 10 YEARS NOW….) IS THE MAJOR VICTIM IN THIS CIRCUMSTANCE.
I HAVE TOLD YOU ALL BEFORE…MY HUSBAND AT THAT TIME…HAD BEEN A CORRECTIONS OFFICER IN RIKERS ISLAND SOLITARY CONFINEMENT….HE WORKED IN THE MOST DANGEROUS POSITION ON HIS JOB. HE WAS NOT ALONE…BUT THAT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH HIS RESPONSE TO THE AMOUNT OF STRESS THAT COMES FROM BEING A CORRECTIONS OFFICER.
ALL I CAN TELL YOU IS THAT MY HUSBAND BECAME MENTALLY SICK. HE RAN FROM RESPONSIBLITY…I LOST OUR HOUSE. MY CITY JOB WAS NOT AS WELL PAYING AS HIS CORRECTIONS JOB. MY X-INLAWS BLAMED ME FOR THEIR SON (MY HUSBAND, MY SON FATHER) BECOMING SICK. SO MY EX-INLAWS DECIDED TO ATTEMPT TO TAKE MY SON….MAKE SURE I LOOSE MY HOUSE TO FORECLOSURE AND BASICALLY MAKE SURE I GOT NO FINANCIAL ASSITANCE TO HELP RAISE MY CHILD.
YOU KNOW SOMETIMES IN LIFE WE WISH WE HAD DONE THINGS DIFFERENTLY….WELL…IN MY CASE I AM QUITE SURE THAT MY X-INLAWS ARE HAPPY THAT THEY ACCOMPLISHED THEIR GOALS CONCERNING MY SON (THEIR GRANDCHILD) AND ME….
I LOST MY HOUSE….I FILED BANKRUPCTY, AND NOW I CANNOT EVEN STEP FOOT INTO THE FRESHMEADOWS, LEFRAK, WINSOR PARK APARTMENT COMPLEXES….TO EVEN LOOK AT AN APARTMENT.
MY CREDIT SCORE IS A LOW 524…ALL BASED ON THE ABOVED MENTIONED PROBLEM…NO BODY IN THIS UPPER MIDDLE CLASS APARTMENT COMPLEXES WANTS ME TO EVEN COME INTO THEIR AREAS JUST TO LOOK INSIDE THEIR WALLS AND SEE IF I LIKE THE APARTMENT.
I AM LIKE HAGAR IN THE HOLY BIBLE—-I AM A BONDS WOMAN…WHO HAS BEEN CAST OUT OF THE CAMP AND TOLD TO WANDER THE WILDERNESS AND HOPE GOD HAS MERCY ON ME AND MY CHILD…( OH,…AND I TAKE CARE OF MY MOTHER TOO….) WHO IS WHEEL CHAIR BOUND.
WHAT A HORRIBLE LIFE I LIVE.
MY LANDLORD IS LOOSING HER HOUSE AND I HAVE TO GO TO THE STREETS.
THE NEIGBOOR HOODS THAT I DO NOT WANT….AND THOSE I DO WANT…TREAT ME THE SAME….WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE…WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE…WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE….WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE
WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE
THAT PHRASE HAS BECOME A MANTRA FOR ALL REALESTATE MANAGEMENT COMPANIES….AND THEY FEEL JUSTIFIED…AS THOUGH THEY ARE READING FROM THE TALMUD…OR HOLYBIBLE OR THE TEN COMMANDMENTS….AS THOUGH THAT NUMBER ON YOUR CREDIT SCORE INDICATES A SUPERNATURAL LOOK INTO YOUR HEART, MIND AND SPIRIT….
AS THOUGH THAT INDICATES WHO AND WHAT KIND OF PERSON YOU REALLY, REALLY ARE?
A CRIMINALLY MINDED PERSON MIGHT HAVE A GREAD CREDIT SCORE…THEY WOULD NOT CARE….
AS LONG AS YOUR SCORE IS IN THE HIGH 600′S OR 700′S…FRESHMEADOWS, WINDSORPARK, LEFRAK WANT YOU TO MOVE RIGHT IN….
NO NEED FOR A CO-SIGNER…JUST MOVE RIGHT YOU HIGH 600′S AND 700′S!
BUT A PRACTICAL “WIDOW” WHOSE X- EXTRANGED SKIZOPHRENIC HUSBAND…CAUSED HER TO BECOME A STATISTIC OF BAD CREDIT…IS NOW BLACK LISTED…AND SHUNNED….AND TREATED LIKE A CRIMINAL…EVEN THOUGH I HAVE BEEN WORKING FOR TWENTY YEARS ON MY CITY JOB…THAT I CAN NOT MENTION IN THIS BLOG…BUT IT IS A GOOD JOB…AND THEY…FRESHMEADOWS, WINDSOR PARK, AND LEFRAK DO NOT CARE….THEY REALLY, DO NOT CARE ABOUT MY WORK HISTORY, MY WORK ETHIC, MY LETTER FROM MY LANDLORD ON MY CHARACTER OR CONDUCT, OR ON TIME ….DID YOU READ THAT…MY ON TIME RENT PAYMENTS….NOT LATE FOR 4 YEARS….
UGH!…SO WHERE DO I TAKE MY FAMILY?????
TO THE STREETS…AND I TAKE MY PROBLEM TO MY BLOG…TO CRY FOWL…WRONG ….DISCRIMINATION….BASED ON A NUMBER…
WHAT? I OWNED A HOUSE AND I RENTED TO TENNANTS…WITH JUST THE USE OF A PAY STUB, PROOF OF JOB, LETTERS OF RECOMMENDATION….
TRUTHFULLY….IT MIGHT BE ANOTHER FORM OF RACIAL DISCRIMINATION…BASED ON STATISTICAL HISTORY OF THE NEWLY ACHIEVING BLACK MIDDLE CLASS AND OTHER MINORITIES IN AMERICA AND NEWYORK AND/OR QUEENS NEWYORK.
HOW CAN I PROVE IT? I ACTUALLY CANNOT…BUT I BET SOMEBODY OUT THERE WILL FIND OUT THROUGH RESEARCH HOW MANY PEOPLE IN MY AGE CATEGORY HAVE MY PROBLEM….
SOMEHOW I SEEM TO BE THE ONLY ONE WHO IS SEEKING AN APARTMENT…SO EVERYONE ELSE IS PRETTY HAPPY…AND ALL OF THE APARTMENT COMPLEXES LIKE FRESHMEADOWS, WINDSOR PARK AND LEFRAK ARE SO FULL THAT THEY WIL NOT EVEN WASTE THEIR TIME WITH A SHAMELESS LOW CREDIT SCORE THAT HAS MY NAME ATTACHED TO IT.
I DID NOT HAVE CREDIT CARD DEBT I LOST MY HOUSE TO FORECLOSURE WHEN MY HUSBAND WALKED AWAY FROM REALITY…WE HAD LOANS ON FIXING THE PROPERTY, AND THESE ARE THE ISSURES THAT CAUSED ME TO FILE BANKRUPTCY.
SO THERE YOU HAVE IT….
ANOTHER BLOG ON MY BIG …BIG AND SCARY LOSS!
THOSE APARTMENT COMPLEXES ARE SO COMFORTABLE WITH THEIR VIEWS ON THE ALMIGHTY HOLY GRAIL OF THE CREDIT SCORE AND WHO EACH PERSON REALLY IS….
THAT THEY SAY —NO NEED TO SEE YOU…YOU HAVE A VERY, VERY, LOW CREDIT SCORE..
WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE
HAVE A NICE DAY….
WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE
WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE
WHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCOREWHAT IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE
DON’T GO TO FRESHMEADOWS APARTMENTS OR WINDSOR PARK IF YOU HAD CATASTROPHIC FAMILY CRISIS….ALL THEY CARE ABOUT IS CREDIT SCORES..NOT PEOPLE
MY CREDIT SCORE IS A BIT MESSY. YOU ALL THAT HAVE READ MY BLOGS KNOW ABOUT THE LOSS OF MY HUSBAND. SO NOW…GUESS WHAT? NO BODY CARES….I LIVE IN QUEENS VILLAGE. I HAVE A JOB THAT IS EXTREMELY RESPECTABLE…I HAVE WORKED IT FOR TWENTY YEARS. YET, STILL AND ALL…AFTER I TOLD FRESHMEADOWS AND WINDSOR PARK APARTMENTS IN QUEENS ABOUT MY HUSBAND BECOMING SKIZOPHRENIC AND CAUSING ME TO HAVE TO FILE BANKRUPCTY AND LOSING MY HOUSE IN FORECLOSURE…THEY TOLD ME NOT TO EVEN BOTHER COMING INTO THEIR OFFICE. THEY REFUSED TO INTERVEIW ME…AND EVEN SEE PAY STUBS OR ANYTHING.
I HAVE BEEN LIVING IN A RENTAL TWO FLOORS OF MY LANDLORDS HOUSE. THE REASON I HAVE TO MOVE IS THAT MY LAND LORD IS LOOSING HER HOUSE TO FORECLOSURE… I DO NOT KNOW WHY…CAUSE I HAVE PAID MY RENT FAITHFULLY…STRANGE UH…? I PAY$1600.00 PER MONTH RENT…I PAY THE UTILITIES TO HEAT THE HOT WATER, AND GAS TO HEAT THE HOUSE AND GAS TO COOK. THE LANDLORD IS LIVING OFF OF ME BASICALLY. THAT IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THE CASE.
I TOLD ALL OF THIS TO THE FRESHMEADOWS AND WINDSOR PARK APARTMENTS AND THEY WOULD NOT EVEN SEE ME FACE TO FACE.
BEFORE THEY EVEN INVITE YOU IN TO SEE AN APARTMENT THE FIRST QUESTION OUT IS “”"”HOW IS YOUR CREDIT SCORE”"”"
WHAT WAS HURTFUL WAS HOW WINDSOR PARK HAD STRUNG ME ALONG…MAKING ME BELIEVE THAT HE (((A MAN NAMED JOSHUA))) WOULD MEET ME ON A WEDNESDAY NIGHT AND CANCELLING AND THEN PROMISING TO MEET WITH ME ON A SUNDAY. THEN CANCELLING THAT ALSO.
I CUT TO THE CHASE AND SAID….”LOOK…YOU ARE NOT GOING TO SHOW ME AN APARTMENT ARE YOU? TELL ME THE TRUTH…IS IT BECAUSE I WAS HONEST AND TOLD YOU ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO MY CREDIT BECAUSE OF THE CATASTROPHIC SICKNESS THAT TOOK MY HUSBAND OUT OF THE PICTURE AND DESTROYED MY CREDIT SCORE?
THE MAN WAS SILENT AND SAID…”LOOK WE HAVE TO FOLLOW THE RULES.” I REPLIED AND STATED…HOW CAN YOU JUDGE ME LIKE OTHER PEOPLE WHO HAVE SIMPLY OVER SPENT THEIR MONEY ON CREDIT CARDS…??? YOU SHOULD LOOK AT EACH FAMILY BASED ON CASE BY CASE BASIS.
THE WINDSOR PARK MAN NAMED JOSHUA…THEN SAID TO ME…LOOK….GET A CO-SIGNER…
I DO NOT HAVE FREINDS THAT WILLCO-SIGN FOR AN APARTMENT….ARE YOU CRAZY…? I am a single woman a Christian woman..who does not have any friends…no real friends…I am alone except for my mother and son. No body will just up and co-sign on an apartment…it is not a house…we are talking a rental apartment…..!
I SAID, WHAT? I PAY $1600.00 PER MONTH…I HAVE NOT BEEN LATE ON MY PAYMENTS AND MY MOTHER HELPS TO PAY TOO…SHE IS ON SOCIAL SECURITY AND PENSION…I AM NOT COMPLETELY ALONE HERE…
BUT WINDSOR PARK AND FRESHMEADOWS HAVE THEIR RULES AND REGULATIONS.
SO I CALLED 311 AND NOW I HAVE RECEIVED AN APLICATION TO THE HOUSING PROJECTS. I MAKE MORE MONEY..THAN THE PEOPLE THAT LIVE THERE BASED ON THE APPLICATION STATES…BUT THAT IS ALL I CAN GET BECAUSE I HAVE THE NEW TABU DISEASE…BAD CREDIT SCORE. 524 to be exact…I have not purchased a car, or anything..so I am a bad risk.
MY CREDIT SCORE IS 524….DUE TO ALL THE PROBLEMS…AND STRUGGLES…
JUST MAKE SURE YOU HAVE A RELATIVE OR FREIND WHO WILL CO-SIGN OR YOU HAVE TO HAVE THAT GREAT CREDIT SCORE TOO…600-700 OR YOU WILL END UP LIKE ME….DISCRIMINATED AGAINST FOR FAMILY CASTROPHIC DISEASE…THAT YOU HAD NO CONTROL OVER…WHAT SO- EVER…
THEY DO NOT CARE THAT I HAVE A HIGHLY HONORABLE JOB THAT I HAVE WORKED ON FOR 20 YEARS AND MAKE IN THE $40,000.00 NOT INCLUDING MY MOTHERS’ ASSISTANCE..
BUT TO THESE MIDDLE INC OME APARTMENT complexes ….LIKE FRESHMEADOWS AND WINDSOR PARK… A WOMAN WHO IS FOURTY-EIGHT (((48)))) HAS A 16 YEAR OLD WHO IS IN A COLLEGE BOARD HIGHSCHOOL, PLAYS TENNIS, AND IS A GOOD KID…. WORKING ON COLLEGE PREPARATION….AND A 79 YEAR OLD MOTHER WHO IS WHEEL CHAIR RIDDEN…
I POSE A VERY GREAT RISK…..I AM A HAZARD TO FRESHMEADOWS…A CITY WORKER WHO HAS 20 YEARS ON THE JOB…AND IS NOT READY TO RETIRE…BECAUSE I HAVE TO SEND MY 16 YEAR OLD TO COLLEGE IN TWO YEARS…..I AM NOT TO BE TREATED DIFFERENTLY….OR EVEN ALLOWED TO SEE WHAT THEIR APARTMENTS LOOK LIKE!
BE WARE YOU DEFAULTING HOME OWNERS…BEFORE YOU END UP LIKE ME….
FORECLOSED UPON AND HOMELESS AND MOVING INTO THE PUBLIC HOUSING PROJECTS WHICH CAN BE VERY DANGEROUS…AT TIMES..
I KNOW…I HAD LIVED AT REDHOOK….BEFORE GANG VIOLENCE WAS SO STRONG ….17 YEARS AGO….SO PLEASE GUYS PRAY FOR MY FAMILY.
PRAY FOR THIS 48 YEAR OLD WOMAN THAT FRESHMEADOWS APARTMENT COMPLEX CONSIDERS A HIGH RISK TENNANT…AND WOULD NOT EVEN ALLOW ME TO STEP FOOT ON THEIR GROUNDS JUST BECAUSE MY HUSBAND GOT SICK…A CIVIL SERVANT WHO WAS CATASTROPHICALLYH SICK…and I lost everything ….so I am not black listed to be shunned by any clean and respectable housing facility.
WOW! WATCH OUT GUYS…PAY THAT MORTGAGE…BEING HOMELESS TODAY IS NOT AN OPTION…YOU MAY BE MEETING ME CARRYING MY BAGGAGE INTO THE PUBLIC HOUSING ….CAUSE THAT IS ALL THAT IS AVAILABLE…SINCE WINDSOR PARK APARTMENTS…DECLINES TO EVEN ALLOW ME TO STEP FOOT ON TO THEIR GROUNDS TO LOOK AT AN APARTMENT BECAUSE MY HUSBAND GOT SICK AND LEFT ME TO FEND FOR MY CHILD AND MY SELF.
I AM BEING VICTIMIZED BY THE NEGATIVES OF MY HUSBAND’S ILLNESS.
I HAD FILED BANKRUPCTY 7 YEARS AGO…BUT THAT WAS NOT A LONG ENOUGH TIME FOR FRESHMEADOWS..OR WINDSORPARK APARTMENT COMPLEXES.
OH, WELL…
JUST TAKE CARE….
I WILL BLOG ABOUT MY MOVE INTO THE PROJECTS AND WHERE I LIVE…
TILL NEXT BLOG…
KICKED TO THE CURB BY FRESHMEADOWS APARTMENTS IN QUEENS AND WINDSORPARK APARTMENTS IN QUEENS.. DUE TO BAD CREDIT SCORE AND CATASTROPHIC ILLNESS THAT DESTROYED MY FINANCIAL FUTURE …SO LATE IN LIFE…. RIVEROFLIFELISAJOY
I PRAY FOR A BETTER FUTURE FOR MY SON…AMEN
KELLERMAN INSURANCE…THE BEST
MY INSURANCE MAN IS NEIL
KELLERMAN…HE IS GREAT…
HERE IS WHAT HE OFFERS…
AUTO INSURANCE,
COMMERCIAL
RECREATIONAL VEHICLES
TRAVEL TRAILERS
CAMPING TRAILERS
GOLF CARTS
ATV’S
TRAIL BIKES (UNLICENSED)
FLEETS
MOTORCYCLES
MOTOR BIKES
MOPEDS
ANTIQUE/CLASSIC
FIRE INSURANCE
HOMEOWNERS ALL THAT
LIFE INSURANCE ETC.
HEALTH INSURANCE TOO!
I HAVE CAR INSURANCE WITH
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GIVE HIM A CALL…
GET A QUOTE…SEE HOW IT
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SENT YOU!!!!
CONTACT HIM AT
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FREE CALL TO
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TRY HIM TODAY…
THIS REALLY IS MY INSURANCE
BROKER…
HE WILL GIVE YOU HIS PERSONAL
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PERSONAL SERVICE…
AND GREAT COVERAGE TOO!
SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…I DONT WEAR SOCKS
I glady tell some people that I do not
wear socks!
My son teases me and says that is why your
feet “LOOK LIKE THAT!”
I love the summer!
I should have been born in the Tropics…
No….I mean it! Really!
I love to feel sun drenched!
I love to feel the warm sun…not the hot
midday sun…but the late afternoon sun
when you sit up under a tree and allow
yourself to feel that breeze and smell
the grass and summer plants and flowers…
with your eyes closed —suddenly you
can even “feel” the earth revolving! You can
hear the leaves on the trees being gently
tosseled by the warm summer winds.
Ah, yes…I love sand between my toes..
I love to see the tops of my feet and toes
become sun tanned…darker that it is
naturally….
I love the red tone my dark skin seems
to take on….
Yes, I truly enjoy SAND BETWEEN MY
TOES!
I remember when I first started working
in Manhattan when I was younger…
My days of walking the Manhattan streets
were fun…except I did not make
enough money to really shop in the
expensive stores…
However, I enjoyed watching the styles
and the people who did shop in those
stores, like Bloomingdales, Macys…etc.
But the Hot Hot streets of Manhattan with
their semi-melt black tar streets would
sometimes feel soft under my toes and
feet when I wore my favorite ballet
slippers as if they were real street shoes.
I loved to dance at that time…so I would go
to a dance studio and attempt to jump
around with “real” dancers in a modern
dance class. I would then leave the class
and afterwards find myself eating a frozen
yogurt from a frozen yogurt stand with
super sweet strawberries on top of my
vanilla frozen yogurt.
I walk down 7th Avenue past 42nd street…
all the way to 34th street and Penn station
and then board the E train to Queens…
the last stop.
I loved the feel of the Manhattan streets in
the summer.
The office workers looked carefree as they
sat watching all the pedestrians walk
by…..Men watching women, and women
talking engrossed in conversations as they
took slow walks back to their buildings to
end their day after lunch.
I know…I had been one of those women
too!
Yet still and all….I loved the City of New
York.
But I still love SAND BETWEEN MY TOES!
When I was about 16 I would go with my
mother to a wealthy woman’s home…Anne
Shaw.
She would rent a house in Fire Island on
Ocean beach.
I loved that place.
My mother would clean that rented home…
and I would walk from the Bay of Ocean
Beach ….on out to the more rough
ocean beach part of the area.
I would literally walk bare foot….I would
saunter down the cement streets…
without a care in the world.
I would wear only my bathing suit and
and smock over it.
I was so thin at the time I would wear
Danskin Leotards/bathing suits.
I had this rich burgandy colored one!
Oh how much I enjoyed those carefree
Days!
Sometimes…most of the time I would bring
my CELLO and play it on the deck of Ms.
Anne Shaw’s rented home that my mother
cleaned while I walked carefree.
I love…SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…
i DON’T WEAR SOCKS EITHER…AND i AM
NOT ASHAMED TO TELL YOU THAT!
i LOVE THE WARM SUMMER SUN, THE
SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…EVEN IF IT IS
ON THE BEACH, OR IN THE BEACH WATER…
i LOVE THE SAND BETWEEN MY TOES…
oH, TO GO BACK TO THOSE CAREFREE DAYS!
YOU KNOW THE HEART HAS A MEMORY….
I have heard and read stories in the
news paper…”Not the Post”—but the Daily
News and Times about people who have
received heart transplants and begin to have
certain behaviors, likes and dislikes of the
owner of the heart that he/she received
in transplantation.
I often wonder..since I read that…what would
someone remember or what strong habits
do I have that would be remembered if I
were to become a heart donator?
My heart would remember my:
First Kiss from my mother when I was born?
My first kiss from my boyfriend when I was
pre-teen?
My first hug, first steps, first days of school
experiences?
My first love?
The day I received Jesus as My Lord and
Savior?
My first witness of who Jesus is in my
life after that Ephiany of Salvation?
My wedding day to my x-husband?
My realization that my husband had
left me the first time….the second time
and when he became tragically sick?
My first nights of sleeping alone in a bed
that I had shared with someone for ten
years.
My first time of loss from a companion who
I would never see again in life
My first look at my son and realize that he
had lost his father forever to a tragic
disease and who would not ever see his
father again.
My first time that my mother would tell me
that I have to go on for my son…and
focus my attention on the Lord and raising
my son without his father…
My first date with a man….two years after
we tragically lost my husband
My son’s first words, my son’s birthday
and how special that was
My son’s look and behavior that reminds
me of his father…
My life since I have learned to let go and
move forward from my fears and allow
God to lead me toward a new and
joyful life…
Yes….you know the HEART HAS A MEMORY
wHAT DOES YOUR HEART REMEMBER?
NEW HAIR DELIMA PART #2 WEAVE BE GONE
yES, CHILE….i HAVE PARTED WITH THAT
WEAVE i WORE FOR AN ENTIRE YEAR.
nOT THE SAME ONE…JUST THAT i HAVE
HIDDEN UP UNDERNEATH ALL THAT HAIR.
i FINALLY GOT THE CORRECT LENGTH…
BUT i WAS NOT AWARE THAT i WOULD
LOOSE HAIR…BECAUSE i COULD NOT
AFFORD TO CHANGE IT ATLEAST EVERY SIX
WEEKS…OR LESS.
dANGEROUS…i HAVE THINNED OUT MY
HAIR…IN MY SCALP!
i DO NOT WANT TO WEAR IT DOWN…SO i
PULL IT BACK TO KEEP IT FROM BEING
OBVIOUSLY TOO THIN.
bECAREFUL…WITH BRAIDS AND WEAVES
LADIES…IF YOU CANNOT AFFORD TO
MAINTENCE IT.
bUT FOR NOW…i AM GETTING USED TO THE
WEAK LOOKING PONY TAIL IN THE BACK OF
MY HEAD.
i DID GET SOME COMPLIMENTS DESPITE
HOW i THINK MY HAIR LOOKS.
sOMETIMES…MOST OF THE TIME…change is
good!
Till next hair blog!
MAMMOGRAPHY FOLLOW UP….UGH!
I had to go to my 6 month follow up for
Mammography!
I was scared and nervous…what else is new?!
The weather was nice that day….but I was
still scared.
The tech was through and I got out at at
good time.
I am waiting the results.
Go GET YOUR MAMMOS DONE….LADIES..
GO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES!
Sincerely
SCARY —NEW HAIR DELIMA!!! NO WEAVE!!!
CHILE!!! I went to my hairdresser and chile!
I was in such shock! My hair weave thinned
out my hair! Lawd have his mercy!
I am so embarressed!
I enjoyed that fake hair on my head…and
NOw….it is shameful and embarressing!
I pulled it back because you can see my
scalp! I am almost bald!
I have gapped teeth in the front and missing
teeth on the side.
Oh, Lawd….what has become of my life!
At one time in my life…I might have been
pretty. But I never thought I was.
Now I see the actual face, hands, mouth,
nose, and eyes. I see the extended
belly and weighted body…
Oh, Lawd! I have the worse attributes of
my parents….I am not the most of anything
I am the least.
Please understand….My hair is extremely
thinn now….but my body extremely
overweight…so what does that look like?
My own husband of ten years missing from
my life had told me back in 1999 that I was
attractive anymore. I had gained weight
after I gave birth to our child back then.
My stomach looked terrible. He went
after an extremely thin woman and left me.
He returned, but then he was there for
my son only….not for me. His heart was
still in that adultery based relationship.
He was tormented by the thoughts of
leaving that lovely thin, frail and needy
woman….He finally could not take it and
he ran back into her arms. I was left
sitting in church one day thinking he
had gone to get the car.
He left me and his own 2 year old child sitting
in the church. Everyone had gone home
and I was waiting until 7:00 at night for
my husband. My child had not eaten, and
neither had I.
My mother finally had to pick me up. It was
horrible and embarressing …that my
husband left me alone and his own child
alone in the church that we had both sat
through a sermon!
I realize now that his heart was with that
woman…and not with me.
He had told me that I was like a “sister” to
him and that he loved that woman…or rather
he was inlove with that woman.
He did not care about my feelings…I had
gained weight and was not attractive
to him.
He finally returned after that episode and
then he got sick. He blamed himself for
his condition due to his own actions.
He has been missing for over 10 years.
He was good to me before he cheated…
but that day…and that statement that I
am a sister to him…or a bore…or not
attractive after I gave birth to his son…
was very painful.
When you get to a certain age you are not
useful anymore. You begin to age…and
then they loose interest.
So I am alone….my scary hair delima is mine
alone….I do not have a mate for over 10
years….so being alone is lonely….but
being told you are not as attractive as
you used to be—or that someone
gets “tired” of you well….that hurts.
Life if funny….I can see the actual
unattractive sides to my life and I wish for
others happiness and wellness.
So yes it is Scary to hair ulgy hair problems
but so what?
I will have to leave my hair up in this
ponytail and wait for it to improve and
grow back.
I will continue to help others….and literally
give up on relationships and become
SELFLESS and give to others as God would
have me do.
I just ask God to help me…in whatever
way he can.
I am not the person that others are…not
as pretty…but that is not for me to be..
but instead give myself over to others
in service to mankind.
So my hair….whatever happens, happens..
So I learn to live and cope with it.
Till next blog…
RIVEROFLIFE…
FEAR OF MOVING ON
LORD, GOD ALMIGHTY
MAKER OF HEAVEN AND EARTH
THOU ARE GREAT AND MIGHTY
REDEEMER OF MY SOUL…
Dear Lord Jesus,
I admit to having fear sometimes
I admit to being prideful and
not accepting the help offered from
my fellowman
I admit to looking back to the
past too often….when I should
be looking to the future
I admit to feeling betrayed and
like a failure when in fact
I have been made victorious by
your love and your salavation
Please forgive me Lord and
guide me back toward the goals
you and I have talked about
I know that you have me in the
palm of your mighty hand…
I want to walk in your perfect will
I ask that you bring me into that
perfect will today.
Have mercy upon me for my
lack of faith, and lack of love
Renew in my heart and clean spirit.
Refresh my spirit in your love
and allow me to spread that
to others
Lord bless my church home,
bless the people in need in the world
bless the lost and hurting
bless my family and friends
Thank you Lord Jesus
Amen
